Many parents are unhappy because of the increasing amount of violence in their children by computer games, TV programs, and other leisure activities. How harmful are these for children? Discuss possible solutions.

Nowadays video games,
tv series
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tv-series
show examples
and many others entertainment activities are becoming more violent according to many angry parents.
This
essay will explain that the main problem related to these practices is the difficulty for the young people to understand
differences
Correct article usage
the differences
show examples
between what is real and what is just
a
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an
show examples
invention and
moreover
that children do not have to copy situations that they see
in
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on
show examples
tv, and how an active control by their family may be the right
solution
.
First
of all, the most relevant issue is let understand to them that these
actvities
Correct your spelling
activities
are fake and they
dont
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don't
have to emulate behaves of their
favorites
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favourites
show examples
actors. Nowadays, is common to see many children that spend their free
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
watching series via streaming or playing with the console or computers. Because of
this
situation
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,situation
show examples
these young people have started to copy main famous films scenes in the real life with serious risks for their safety.
To
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For
show examples
instance, in Denmark 3 students have killed with guns many students from their school because
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
were obsessed
by
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with
show examples
a war video game named Call of Duty. The most practical
solution
to
this
problem may be the direct action of their parents.
First
of all, they have to ban the cruel and violent
programes
Correct your spelling
programmes
programs
and games
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
their babies and they must choose educational activities that can allow their sons to develop new
Correct your spelling
competencies
show examples
competences
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competencies
show examples
and enhance their knowledge. Thank
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the spreading of many streaming services is easy to find programmes and games that are a good
solution
for young people.
For example
, on Netflix and Spotify there
are
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is
show examples
the
possibilty
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possibility
to discover many contents like scientific series or historical
poadcast
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podcast
podcasts
that might be the right
compromised
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compromise
show examples
between fun and educational
pourpose
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purpose
purposes
.
However
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,However
show examples
the birth of new forms of
enterteinment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
might be harmful especially for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children the intervention by adults could be the perfect
solution
to reduce problems related to these leisure
actvities
Correct your spelling
activities
.
Submitted by andreacorbelli30 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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