There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

#music #world #country

Music

nowadays has turned to be an activity by which many of us relax. Many feel so much relaxed by listening to

music

and while others find themselves more comfortable with playing musical instruments more often.

Sometime

Replace the word

Sometimes

show examples

many songs are used to cheer up mood and state of mind.

This

will give internal peace and its help to forget all tensions.

Firstly

, the universe is divided into many different cultures and traditions. Every part of the world has its own unique identity. Different

people

have their own likes and dislikes.

Similarly

, when we talk about

music

, it

also

differs from region to region. While subcontinent

people

are more attracted towards classical and folk which is often

a slow rhythmic

Remove the article

slow rhythmic music

a piece of slow rhythmic music

show examples

music

and

people

of western

people

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

fast track

music

because classical

music

is the part of the culture of the subcontinent and mostly on different occasions and events

people

prefer jazz and their folk

music

Secondly

, as the world is forwarding fast day-by-day and

advancement

Fix the agreement mistake

advancements

show examples

are taking place in every field, the same is true for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

music

. In

music

nowadays there are different software like android apps are introduced which are

also

helpful for listeners I personally believe that someone put more attention and show a high level of interest when

music

is directly related to their tradition and culture. Especially in our subcontinent,

people

are attracted towards traditional songs as compared to international or foreign

music

and

coumnity

Correct your spelling

community

give more importance to their traditions because tradition is something which makes you proud or we can say that it’s your identity.

Submitted by Manpreet Toor on Wed Jun 30 2021

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

263 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

emotional release
cultural significance
globalization
cultural exchange
technology
preservation
cultural heritage
social cohesion
expression
consumption
production
traditional music
international music
diversity
identity

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There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that all school students should learn a foreign language. Others think that a students should not be required to learn a foreign language if he or she does not have talent for it Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Nowadays,a growing number of peoples with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development ?

People are using a lot of online language translation apps. Are there more advantages than disadvantages to such services?

Task 2 Some countries invest in specialized sport facilities for top athletes but not for the average person. Is this a positive or a negative development ?