Sending criminals to prison is not the best method of dealing with them. Education and job training are better ways to help them. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
While many are of the opinion that sentencing convicts to prison
is
the most effective way of dealing with them, others would argue, and I totally concur, that rehabilitationChange the verb form
are
as well as skill acquisition training
are the best means of assisting these people. Add the comma(s)
, as well as skill acquisition training,
This
essay will explain further
on these points.
On the one hand, sending them to prison instantly stops their anti-social behaviour as proposed by many. However
, I do not agree with this
claim. They are of the suggestion that by convicting these criminals, they would be separated from their prey's community and can no longer carry out their activities. For example
, in Nigeria, following the arrest of the notorious leader of the heardmen
group in the northern part of the nation, their activities dropped significantly. Due to the fact that Correct your spelling
herdsmen
herdmen
headmen
this
detatches
them from their prey, some are of the opinion that Correct your spelling
detaches
detached
this
is the best way to deal with them. However
, this
is not so, as there is high
tendency of re-offending following their release back into Add an article
a high
the
society.
Correct article usage
apply
On the other hand
, some would argue and I concur that rehabiliting
these criminals as well as teaching them new skills would help them become better citizens than merely restricting their movement. Correct your spelling
rehabilitating
For instance
, due to the benefit
Add a comma
,benefit
this
offers, most prisoners in the developed countries are been persuaded to picked
up a skill and take up subjects in mental health. There are so many reasons why people commit Change the form of the verb
pick
Add an article
a crime
the crime
crime
, while some are pre-meditated, others are not . Whatever be the reason, re-educating these Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
law breakers
has been proven to be useful in making them Correct your spelling
lawbreakers
better
Add an article
a better
person
.
In conclusion, despite the fact that some individuals would opine that confining these law-breakers is the most superior means to Fix the agreement mistake
people
tackel
their excesses, others propose and I support that they should be re-educated and taught new jobs as Correct your spelling
tackle
take
this
would produce more positive effects.Submitted by Victoria on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite