Task 2: Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it.

#people #attention

In the contemporary world, we have different views about that advertising plays a vital role to convince their customers to purchase their products.

Nevertheless

, some people believe that the

tool does not attract

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

audiences to buy it. It seems to me that advertising always

Change the verb form

show examples

well-know

Correct your spelling

well-known

show examples

tools

Fix the agreement mistake

tool

show examples

in order to stimulate the

customer

buy

Fix the infinitive

to buy

show examples

the products successfully. There is a reason why people will be convinced after seeing some

on social media,

brochure

Fix the agreement mistake

brochures

show examples

and so on. The

first

justification, the

product

is represented about the models , shape of

product

Add an article

the product

show examples

as well as the quality to audiences who do not know the

elaboratable

Correct your spelling

elaborate

elaborative

product

previously.

This

is due to the fact they have not ever use it before through the

In addition

, the

tool extremely

success

Replace the word

successful

show examples

due to the fact that it helps to

saving

Change the verb form

save

show examples

an amount of time as well as it is easy for finding the suitable items which they need based on the

. Take the example of, the

customer

Correct pronoun usage

who have

show examples

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

a demand of buying

the

Correct article usage

show examples

smartphone.

However

, the market

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

a range of smartphones

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

come from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

different branches.

Hence

, the business

need

Change the verb form

needs

show examples

to use the

tools to advertise the function of their smartphone , the

apperiance

Correct your spelling

appearance

experience

, which is better than their competition to arouse

customer

on website, television, social media and so on.

Moreover

, they do not spend a lot of time to commute some stores to see many smartphones.

On the other hand

, some people believe that advertising no longer

attract

Change the verb form

attracts

show examples

attention to customers. Nowadays, many companies extremely focus on their profit,

instead

of their quality. So they spent a great deal of money

Change preposition

apply

show examples

marketing

Change the form of the verb

market

show examples

their

product

. After the

customer

see

Change the verb form

sees

show examples

that , they are willing to buy

this

As a result

, the

product

Change the verb form

does

show examples

not bring

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

good quality

Add the particle

to follow

show examples

Change the form of the verb

followed

show examples

by the

customer

’s expectation. From

this

point, the

customer

’s

satisfication

Correct your spelling

satisfaction

reduce as well as they may not be attracted by some kind of

. To sum up, I am strongly favour of advertising

that is

able to give the

customer

attention and it will

also

develop more and more in the future to create some useful

product

to audiences.

Submitted by caomyphuong3004 on Fri Jul 02 2021

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

364 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

persuade
promote
attract
influence
impact
consumerism
commercialism
market
product
brand
endorsement
manipulative
saturated
overwhelmed
repetitive
distracting
irrelevant
exaggerated
misleading
desensitized

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Task 2: Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Money is important in most people's lives. Although some people think it is more important than others. What do you feel are the right uses of money? What other factors are important for a good life? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your experience.

In many countries traditional customs are being lost. Why do you think this is? What can parents and schools do to keep traditional customs alive?

All over the world, societies are facing a growing problem with obesity. This problem affects both children and adults. What are reasons for this rise in obesity? How could it be tackled?

Advertisements are becoming more and more common in everyday life. Is it a positive or negative development?

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to leam how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.