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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Each year, the crime rate increases. What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity?

#year #crime #rate #increases #rise #activity
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Nowadays, the percentage of crime rates has been increased worldwide. The following paragraphs discuss what are the problems of increasing the
rate
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 of a criminal issue.
In addition
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, how it can solve by given several solutions from both sides the government and individuals. On the one hand, there are major reasons behind the high
rate
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 of
crimes
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. To clarify that the
first
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 reason is a lack of education in a poor country because they have an economic crisis and do not have any resources for money.
Also
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, developing countries are facing an increasing unemployment
rate
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 that will lead to having many
crimes
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 especially among young people
such
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 as stealing money and drugs abuse. Another reason for that, some families have divorce relationships
as a result
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 of
this
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 it impacts the child behaviours ,
for example
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, low self-esteem.
This
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 will make the child have bad friends and follow them in a wrong way of life.
On the other hand
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, increasing
this
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 problem can be solved by best prevention in different ways.
Firstly
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, starting with the government role, it should find a solution and work with other modern countries to improve their economic status that will lead to providing a quality of education and opportunity jobs.
Moreover
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, they should support the young people by enhancing them to participate in community services that help to increase self-esteem. The
last
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 solution that the parents monitor their children and give them a warm and best family environment.
Also
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, the individual side takes more responsibility to keep their lives away from the
crimes
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 by making themselves working busy all the time. To conclude, the
crimes
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rate
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 impacts society and that's why the government and individuals should act by solving
this
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 problem in different ways.
Submitted by yahyagamal2010 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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