In some countries, advertisers increase the amount of advertising which try to persuade children to buy snacks, toys, and other goods. Parents object to such pressure on children. but some advertisers claim that there is useful information in the advertisements. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The advertisement industry is huge, every year the money that companies invest in
this
increase. Despite the fact that some
ads
can be useful for knowing some
products
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
am of the opinion that the main
objetive
Correct your spelling
objective
is selling and not always they will focus on the useful information of their
products
. When we talk about selling
products
like toys or snacks companies
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
try to focus on the advantage of their
products
over the competence. They always
emphasis
Replace the word
emphasise
show examples
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
making
this
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
cheerful and animated advertisements to
try
Add the particle
totry
show examples
persuade the children.
Usually
Add a comma
,Usually
show examples
they show
this
Change the determiner
this kid
these kids
show examples
kids
enjoying their
product
. The problem with
this
is that a lot of times they
dont
Correct your spelling
don't
won't
say anything that let the parents know more
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
their
product
from a point of view of if
this
is good or not for their
kids
.
In addition
to
this
,
kids
are not adults that will
difference
Replace the word
differentiate
show examples
between what is true or not of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
ads
and they may have the wrong idea of some
product
.
On the other hand
, I think that companies are evolving with what they show in their
ads
. With
this
Add a comma
,this
show examples
I mean that nowadays society
look
Change the verb form
looks
show examples
for
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
publicity that shows information
that is
useful for us.
For example
,
this days
Change the determiner
this day
these days
show examples
when they talk about some snacks for
kids
, they used to
shown
Change the form of the verb
show
show examples
a bunch of
kids
having fun and saying how nice was the
whatever
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
product
. Now they focus a lot
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
showing more information for the parents about the quality of their
product
in aspects of nutrition values and ingredients. To sum up, It is true that the number of
ads
is increasing and their main objective is to sell more but because consumers are asking for more they are adapting to
this
, trying to sell their
product
showing why their
product
is good and suitable for
kids
.
Submitted by alvarobsaavedra on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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