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Today, people are surrounded by advertising. This affects what people think is important and has a negative impact on pp’s lives? To you agree or disagree

#people #impact #pp’s #lives
In these days and ages,
while
 some say that being surrounded by advertisements not only has a detrimental effect on
people
’s lives but
also
impacts
 human beings’ thoughts, I would like to argue my balanced perspective in
this
 essay. On the one hand, advertising is one of the main causes of overconsumption among individuals.
In other words
, promoting products usually employs seductive elements in content and persuasive techniques to manipulate emotions and desires, resulting in a sense of dissatisfaction and the constant need for more.
As a result
, if
people
 keep buying, they will be stuck in financial strain.
In addition
, advertisement
also
 has a detrimental effect on
people
’s security, especially for youngsters who are prone to be insecure because of their appearance. It means that promotion usually shows idealized and often unrealistic beauty standards, leading to body image issues,
consequently
, creating low self-esteem which contributes to a negative impact on well-being.
On the other hand
, adverts have positive
impacts
. Advertising is considered the most effective way to assist brands in raising awareness when launching new products, leading to an increase in sales volume attributed as a factor of business development.
Besides
, adverts are
also
 used as a tool to deliver valid stories to communities, making significant changes in
people
’s perceptions.
For instance
, thanks to the campaign named gender stereotype elimination conducted by Unilever, about 90% of men admitted that they had changed their minds related to the negativity of gender bias that might have a positive impact on their behaviours towards gender roles. In conclusion,
although
 it is undeniable that advertisement
impacts
 negatively on communities’ perspectives
such
 as causing overconsumption or self-loathing, I believe it create positive aspects related to today’s issues. It is estimated that if advertising is regulated more strictly and able to convey meaningful messages, it will be recognized by an open-minded society. Negative: overconsumption: advetisement -> using seductive elements in content and algorithm targeting to
people
 tending to be intersted with
this
 products -> high frequency -> make
people
 change minds even they actually do not need them. Detrimental
impacts
 on
people
 security: exploiting celebrities who have unrealistic beauty -> consumers feel insecure about themselves
Submitted by nguyenmysam722001 on

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task achievement
For Task Achievement, ensure that you fully address all parts of the prompt. In this case, provide a stronger stance and reasoned argument throughout the essay. Offer a more direct and explicit response to the question of whether advertising has a negative impact, and use more comprehensive examples to illustrate your points clearly.
coherence cohesion
For Coherence and Cohesion, work on creating a clear and logical structure. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea, and use cohesive devices appropriately to connect your ideas within and between paragraphs. Avoid repetition and inconsistencies in argumentation to improve the logical flow of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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