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Writing Samples /
Band 6

Wealthy countries should accept more refugees and provide them with basic assistance such as food and housing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #refugees #assistance #food
Prosperous nations should extend their support to the fleeing
people
 from
war torn
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war-torn
show examples
 countries or countries with
jeopardize
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jeopardizing
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 political
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
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 by supporting basic humanitarian aid. I strongly agree with
this
 idea.
Firstly
,
people
 who lost their homes in their country does not have
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 secure future as their chances of getting back to their country of origin would almost become negligible. In
past
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the past
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 decade, there
have
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has
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 been steady growth in
number
Change the article
a number
the number
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 of
people
 with no recognized identity.
More
Add an article
The more
A more
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 fortunate nation should lend their generosity in welcoming these helpless
people
 providing them with accommodation and livelihood.
For example
, after
Syrian
Correct article usage
the Syrian
show examples
 civil
war
Add a comma
,war
show examples
 millions of
people
 displaced. Canada and Turkey offered them Permanent Residency and absorb them
in
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into
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 their societies.
Secondly
, as per
UN
Correct article usage
the UN
show examples
 Red Cross society
report
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,report
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 many humanitarian relief companies are under relentless pressure to support
growing
Add an article
the growing
a growing
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 number of displaced
people
 mostly due to war and political turmoil. The United Nations should introduce
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 law that can allow
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
generous countries to grant residency status to these
people
 and provide them decent lifestyle.
For example
, Jordan, which has given shelter to over two million Syrians and Palestinian
people
, has created an ecosystem where they are utilizing the
entrepreneur
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entrepreneurial
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 skills of these forced migrants to generate
the
Correct article usage
apply
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jobs both for
local
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locals
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 and refugees alike.
Similarly
, Turkey has given
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
shelter
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their southern border to half a million Syrians. In Conclusion, I believe that every country across the globe should be welcoming to the displaced
people
 from their continents and ease the border restriction to provide their basic human right of shelter and food. Every human being has a right to live with dignity and peacefully whether
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
one is an unfortunate refugee or a citizen.
Submitted by nsch4u on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Refugees
  • Asylum seekers
  • Humanitarian aid
  • Integration
  • Multiculturalism
  • Economic impact
  • Public services
  • International law
  • Conventions relating to the status of refugees
  • Labor market
  • Cultural enrichment
  • Burden-sharing
  • Resettlement programs
  • Host country
  • Border security
  • Comprehensive policy
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