IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Some people think certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behind bars. To what extent do you agree?

#people #prisoners #community #work #bars
Community service is the best punishment for people who commit certain crimes. While some individuals argue that they should be kept in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
jail.
This
 essay will give arguments in favour of the alternative sentence and provide a logical conclusion.
To begin
 with, public service often persuades outlaws not to re-offend. Working with sick children or elderly people makes some realize that there are people who have more difficult lives than they do. So community work can be an educational experience. The prime example is a US judge named Mike Cicconetti who created an alternative sentence. He believes that doing time in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
jail won't make any difference for offenders that are supposed to change after the completion of their sentence. One of his creative punishments was applied to teens accused of speeding. They were offered a choice between having their license suspended for 90 days or for a shorter period and spending one day working as a school crossing guard.
This
 practice has noticeably reduced the crime rates and now young offenders rare appear in his courtroom for speeding.
Moreover
, it is less likely that spending time in prisons will discourage criminals to break the law again.
For example
, juvenile criminals will discover a severe criminal world and learn more about it, which may tempt them into committing more crimes. In prisons many of the inmates take drugs and some got insulted both mentally and physically. To conclude, I believe, that community service has important advantages especially for minor crimes and for society.
Submitted by ms.roksss on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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