The use of violence in music lyrics, video games and films seen by children is causing concern in many societies. What problems may be caused by this type of violent imagery, and what steps could be taken to lessen the impact on young people

Most
parents
are worrying about improper lyrics, video games, music and films and all of those can be seen by their
children
. It increases the high-risk of mental
health
for
children
, and
also
two ways in which the situation can be solved. First of all, the gravest problem caused by violence in
content
for
children
is the harmful impact on their minds. Social media and
content
creators are huge influencers for kids these days.
Children
Change preposition
at in
show examples
in
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
early
ages
Fix the agreement mistake
age
show examples
tend to believe whether it is harmful or not.
Thus
, they see robbery and criminals as normal things in society.
Second
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The second
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problem is the mental
health
damage for
children
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,
show examples
especially for their behaviors. In
teenages
Correct your spelling
teenagers
, things are starting to get complicated. They absorb what they see or listen to and learn things from them rather than engaging with their
parents
. Study shows that watching cruel or illegal actions lead to indecorous
behavior
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behaviour
show examples
and unsteady mental
health
. To counteract these dangers, the first step should be to pass laws against improper
content
. Governments have to control public
content
and have restrictions on ages.
Government
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The government
show examples
can collaborate with
content
producers and create
content
for
children
. It can
be
Verb problem
have
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an educational or positive impact on their behaviour.
Furthermore
, the care of
parents
on
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for
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children
has to be
over cautious
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over-cautious
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. They have to pay attention to what music or movies their
children
are listening to or watching.
Parents
can talk to their
children
and suggest more positive or useful
content
. In conclusion, high levels of
content
containing cruelty affect
children
in a negative way
Add the comma(s)
,
show examples
especially for their mental
health
.
However
, government and
parents
' involvement can solve the problem.
Submitted by alexstudyin on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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