Due to the development and rapid expansion of supermarket in some countries, many small, local business are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local business will bring about the death of local communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, Due to
advacements
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advancements
advancement
and rapid growth in
malls
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and
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supermarkets
supermakets
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,supermakets
show examples
many local vendors and
businesses
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are
afftcted
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affected
effected
in many ways. It is believed by some
people
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that
closure
Correct article usage
the closure
show examples
of small and local
businesses
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will be very detrimental for local
communities
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. I totally agree with the notion because
supermarkets
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and modern
malls
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attract
lot
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a lot
show examples
of
people
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and no one is willing to buy
products
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from local
shops
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.
To begin
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with, there are several reasons why
people
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are
prefering
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preferring
more and more
supermarkets
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rather
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
buying
procuts
Correct your spelling
products
from small vendors.
Firstly
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, many big
malls
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and
supermarkets
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offers
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offer
show examples
huge discount on every
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products
Change to a singular noun
product
show examples
to gain customers.
This
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is because they are purchasing
products
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in a bulk.
Secondly
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,
supermarkets
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provide all the necessary things
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
a single roof.
For example
Linking Words
, in
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malls
Add a comma
,malls
show examples
people
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can buy
grocerry
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grocery
groceries
, vegetables, fruits,
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clothes
show examples
cloths
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clothes
show examples
and so on.Another reason is that nowadays
people
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prefer to
shop
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without any
disturbunce
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disturbance
disturbances
.
For instance
Linking Words
, before
purchesing
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purchasing
Add a comma
,
show examples
they can check and try every
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products
Change to a singular noun
product
show examples
by themselves, which is sometimes very
difficlt
Correct your spelling
difficult
in a small
shop
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.Due to all these
reasons
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,reasons
show examples
small
shop
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owners are facing
lack
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a lack
show examples
of customers in their
shops
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. Many
peole
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people
think that
Correct your spelling
closure
clouser
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the clouser
show examples
of local
businesses
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will
affects
Change the verb form
affect
show examples
local
communities
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. Many economically weaker
people
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are still prefer
Change the verb form
still prefer
show examples
to buy
products
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from local
shops
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. Because sometimes local
shop
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owners give
products
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in credit.
Moreover
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, some
people
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also
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buy their daily necessary items from local
shops
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to save time
such
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as milk, vegetables and so on. And they only prefer
supermakets
Correct your spelling
supermarkets
when they have to buy so many
products
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. So if
peole
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people
will not buy
products
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from local
busniesses
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businesses
business
then
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after all
Add the comma(s)
, after all,
show examples
it would be detrimental for local
communities
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. In
conclution
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, I think
closure
Add an article
the closure
show examples
of local
businesses
Use synonyms
will bring
lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
of difficulties to local
communities
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by tithipatel1731 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic benefits
  • community identity
  • personalized customer service
  • strong relationships
  • wide variety of goods
  • lower prices
  • community spirit
  • local events
  • sponsorships
  • cultural heritage
  • homogenize
  • logistics
  • carbon footprint
  • inequality
  • low-income individuals
What to do next:
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