Art is considered an important part of the society as well as an expression of its culture. Do you think it is important for the children to be taught art? Do you think children should be encouraged to focus on art rather than other subjects?

#art #part #society #expression #culture #children #focus #subjects

One of the imperative parts of a society is considered to be

art

also

as an expression of its culture. In my opinion, it is crucial to teach it to

children

, as if it has a creative side and helps them to express themselves better.

However

, there ought to be a balance between

art

and other subjects in the school curriculum. Artists use

art

as a weapon to showcase their thoughts

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and express their feelings.

Also

, as Nepal is rich in cultures and heritages, various cultures are represented through

art

which helps to deeply understand the history. Teaching juveniles

art

from an early age helps them to be creative, which is a crucial factor of personality.

Furthermore

, some

children

are gifted in

art

, by teaching them

art

at a young age can nurture their artistic ability.

Hence

children

can develop creative personalities through

art

, and it can help nurture

an artistically gifted

Correct the article-noun agreement

an artistically gifted child

artistically gifted children

show examples

children

In addition

, juveniles are not able to linguistically express their thoughts and feelings. Through it and symbols it is easier for the juvenile to express their thoughts. mysteries in child psychiatry takes

art

lessons to deeply understand the juvenile's psychology.

Thus

, it is imperative to teach

children

art

, so that they could easily express their feelings. In schools, there ought to be a balance between

art

and other subjects,

such

as math, science history and so on. Though

art

helps a child to be more creative, not every child has the same needs interest in

art

. Apart from artists, society equally needs athletes, doctors, businessmen and scientists.

Consequently

, the school needs to facilitate students a balance in all subjects. To conclude,

art

clearly is an essential part of our society, and

children

need to be taught

art

to develop their creative personality.

Also

, it helps to express themselves when they are not enough linguistically capable. ,

however

Add a comma

,however

show examples

children

should not be encouraged to focus only on

art

; schools ought to provide a balanced curriculum.

Submitted by devina on Fri Jul 09 2021

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

326 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Art is considered an important part of the society as well as an expression of its culture. Do you think it is important for the children to be taught art? Do you think children should be encouraged to focus on art rather than other subjects?

Fully explain your ideas

Many children no longer read books and instead spend their time using modern technology. While some people think this is a positive trend, others think it is a problem. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

You have bought some clothing online and are not satisfied with your purchase Write a letter to the company that you bought the company from. In you email Give details of he purchase describe the problem explain why you need a replacemnet urgently

Some people think it is a good thing for senior managers to have much higher salaries than the other workers in a company. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that good health is a basic human need, so the medical service should not be run by profit making companies. Do you think the disadvantage of private health care outweigh the advantages.