IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

With access to the internet and social media websites, many children are exposed to a number of dangerous situations. Adults should thus limit access to the internet for their children. Do you agree or disagree?

#access #internet #media #websites #children #situations #adults #limit
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Due to
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 and social websites, people have got the advantage of being connected with each other across the world.
However
Linking Words
, it has created problems especially for teenagers by making them vulnerable. I strongly agree that parents should control
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
internet
Use synonyms
usage
Replace the word
users
show examples
 when it comes to their
children
Use synonyms
 and
this
Linking Words
 essay will discuss the same. As
Use synonyms
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 is accessible to most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people nowadays, it is very evident that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
not all who are using
Use synonyms
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 are of good intentions and use it mostly to satisfy their evil deeds and for these,
children
Use synonyms
 who are not fully aware of these sinister intended people, become an easy target. They lure them by offering a short film or photoshoot and
then
Linking Words
 engage them in foul
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
 like making obscene videos or images.
Thus
Linking Words
, it is imperative that parents should have an eye on their
children
Use synonyms
’s
internet
Use synonyms
 usage.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, on social media there are many ads floating everywhere related to online games or any other product which seems very attractive to the
children
Use synonyms
 and without understanding the consequence, they try to buy the product which exposes them to the attackers.
For example
Linking Words
,
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
entering the personal card details on a suspicious website gives
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
access to the hacker to hack all the money from the account.
Hence
Linking Words
, parents should always look after the
children
Use synonyms
’s activity especially when they are trying to buy or sell something on
Use synonyms
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
. To conclude,
Use synonyms
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
 is very important if it is used in a proper way and in
case
Correct article usage
the case
show examples
 of
children
Use synonyms
, it is parent’s responsibility to always check how their
children
Use synonyms
 are using the
internet
Use synonyms
Submitted by alok.sabran on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • dangerous situations
  • limit access to the internet
  • inappropriate content
  • online predators
  • physical and mental health
  • monitoring and guiding
  • online safety
  • school curriculum
What to do next:
Look at other essays: