Some people think that a large amount of time and money should be spent on the protection of wild animals while other think that is should be better spent on the human population. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

In recent years,
many attentions
Fix the agreement mistake
much attention
show examples
have been drawn
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
protection
Add an article
the protection
show examples
of wildlife.
Although
some
people
believe that
people
should spend a large amount of
time
and
money
on human beings, I would argue that wild
animals
deserve
people
to input their
time
and
money
up to a point. On the one hand, those who believe spending
money
and
time
on humans is better might argue that
people
are an important component of
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
nature, and they can affect the development of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
. The government has
responsibility
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the responsibility
a responsibility
show examples
to put their budget on the improvement of
quality
Correct article usage
the quality
show examples
of
people
’s life in order to have a better
society
.
For example
, the governments of developing countries should take their
time
and
money
to help the poverties who struggle for life.
However
, if these governments decide to put a large amount of their
time
and
money
on
Change preposition
into
show examples
wild
animals
, many poor
people
will suffer from
tough
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a tough
show examples
life.
On the other hand
, my view is that
people
should spend some
money
and
time
on
protection
Add an article
the protection
show examples
of wildlife. The reason for
this
is that those
animals
are important in the ecosystem. For
instant
Add an article
an instant
show examples
, some wild
animals
such
as frogs and birds are quite essential in the food chain. They can eat pests so that
people
do not need to worry about the damage to farms
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
caused by pests.
In contrast
, if government spend
large
Add an article
a large
show examples
portion of
budget
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the budget
show examples
on
human
Correct article usage
the human
show examples
population and do not pay attention to the wildlife,
people
can build a better
society
, but there will be
extinctions
Correct your spelling
extinction
show examples
of some wild species. In conclusion,
although
spending
money
and
time
on population can help the development of
society
, I believe that
people
should spend some
money
and
time
on
protection
Add an article
the protection
show examples
of wild
animals
in order to have a better ecosystem.
Submitted by lucky19961104 on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • ecosystem stability
  • pollination
  • water purification
  • climate regulation
  • eco-tourism
  • scientific research
  • moral and ethical responsibility
  • deforestation
  • pollution
  • financial cost
  • social issues
  • healthcare
  • education
  • fund allocation
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