Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities.Other,however,say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measure are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #health #sports #facilities #effect #measure

In today's modern world,

health

the

Correct article usage

show examples

major issue in day-to-day life. People are getting worried

for

Change preposition

about

show examples

their fitness. Few individuals have believed that

health

can be improved by adding

sports

facilities as a part of our daily routines, while others oppose

this

due to its effects.

This

essay will argue what should humans

adopt

Correct your spelling

adapt

show examples

for their better well being. Advocates of introducing

sports

have stated that

however

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society has been dealing with hazardous

health

issues.

Moreover

, due to the advancement of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

electronic gadgets human’s life becomes easy that needs no physical movement.

As a result

, their physical

activities

had been diminishing.

For instance

, the individual works in a company, his job is to sit on a chair all long day,

this

results in less physical movement and

this

will lead to many

health

issues like obesity, gastrointestinal problems etc.

Furthermore

sedentary

Add an article

a sedentary

show examples

lifestyle is

also

Change the article

the

show examples

main reason for

health

issues. In regards to

this

Add a comma

,this

show examples

the government should impose

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

high penalties on

high fat

Add a hyphen

high-fat

show examples

foods. The exercise equipment should be installed

Change preposition

show examples

public parks by the council authorities.

Public

Correct article usage

The public

show examples

also

indulge themselves in any

sports

activities

of their interest like swimming.

Additionally

, few believed that,

Change preposition

apply

show examples

introducing

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

fitness machines or

sports

activities

, it could

Correct your spelling

affect

show examples

effect

Correct your spelling

affect

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

individual

health

. because some humans don’t know how to select the

activities

according to their

health

otherwise

it would be affected adversely. To conclude

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

Change the capitalization

show examples

strongly admit that, the individual should actively participate in any

health

fitness program but under some special guidance or by keeping in mind their

health

problems. Along with all these, diets

also

plays

important

Add an article

an important

show examples

role. So, along with any physical

activities

balanced

Add an article

a balanced

show examples

diet

also

Change the verb form

show examples

added.

Submitted by bhajan.verma on Tue Jul 13 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

282 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities.Other,however,say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measure are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people believe that it is a good idea that older people continue to work if it is possible for them to do so. Do you agree or disagree?

Since it is so easy to reach a large audience on the internet, people have to be exceptionally talented to become famous these days. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is imp for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both views and give opinion.

some people argue that the best way to reduce pollution and traffic jams from city centres is to make public transport free. do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialize online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.