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Band 2

Social media is becoming increasingly popular amongst all age groups. However, sharing personal information on social media websites does have risks. Do you think that the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#media #age #groups #information #websites #risks
This
 line graph illustrates the modifies which happened on the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of international
tourists
whom
Change the pronoun
who
show examples
 arrived on
period
Add an article
the period
a period
show examples
 of fifteen years among five different countries. In general, it is clear from the graph that
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 recent
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
both
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 and France have the highest
number
 of global
tourists
, while Egypt and Brazil have the lowest
number
.
On
Change preposition
At
show examples
 the beginning of the
period
,
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 was the highest one and it is line started to increase until it reached it is
peak
Add an article
the peak
a peak
show examples
 (around 90
million
visitors
). After that, it decreased suddenly to 80
million
visitors
. About France, the
number
 of
tourists
 rose constantly
on
Change preposition
during
show examples
 the whole
period
 until it
be
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 closed to
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
.
Moreover
, about Malaysia, the
number
 of
tourists
 increased gradually
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the whole
period
 by around 20
million
visitors
.
In addition
, the lines of
both
 Brazil and Egypt only
went-up
Correct your spelling
went up
show examples
 slightly about 10
million
 more
tourists
. To sum up,
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
 the end of the
period
both
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 and France have the hugest
number
 of international
visitors
, while
both
 Brazil and Egypt have the smallest
number
.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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