IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that parents should limit the time their children spend watching TV and playing computer games and encourage them to read books instead. Do you agree or disagree?

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It is believed by some that the amount of
time
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 that
children
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 spend watching television and playing games on the computer should be restricted and reading books should be encouraged
instead
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.
This
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 essay completely agrees with
this
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 statement bečause
this
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 would boost
children
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's imagination and improve their cognitive function. Parents should encourage their
children
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 to read books and spend less
time
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 in front of screens because
this
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 can help to stimulate their imagination.
That is
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 to say, when
children
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 watch TV or play computer games the content is given passively, without the need to think or imagine.
On the contrary
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, when they are reading a book they have to imagine the situation, and
this
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 increases their creativity, which is an important skill for several aspects of life.
For example
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,
children
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 who frequently read are more likely to become adults that can solve daily problems, because they are more creative and can think outside the box.
Furthermore
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, parents should limit screen
time
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 and stimulate reading in their
children
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 because
this
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 improves their brain function.
This
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 is because when
children
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 read they can learn new words and grammar structures, enhance their reading comprehension, and improve their memory, among other benefits.
Therefore
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, if they spend more
time
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 reading than playing video games, their lexical resources and their ability to understand will increase drastically, helping them to succeed at school.
For example
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, it is well-known that students who read in their spare
time
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 outperform students who do not in core subjects,
such
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 as maths and science. In conclusion, parents should limit screen
time
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 and promote reading books to their
children
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, not only because it helps by developing aids in developing
children
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's imagination, but
also
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 because it enhances their cognitive function.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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