IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

computer are being used more and more in education.some people say its positive trend other say its negative impact. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

No doubt, in
ther
Correct your spelling
the
 modern era
computer
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 plays an essential role in everyone life
becuase
Correct your spelling
because
 it
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
 life easier. In every
field
Add a comma
,field
show examples
 the
use
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
computer
Add an article
a computer
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are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 increased day by day. some individuals say that it is
positive
Add an article
a positive
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 development.
However
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,
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
 think that it has
negative
Add an article
a negative
show examples
 impact. In
this
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essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will discuss both the view along with my opinion. To embark upon, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 some reason why
Use synonyms
computer
Add an article
the computer
a computer
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 is
essentail
Correct your spelling
essential
 in
Use synonyms
education
Add an article
the education
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system
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.
First
Linking Words
 and foremost, when students doing their
study
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 while
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use
Add an article
the use
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 of
computer
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 they can gain extra knowledge from
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 and understand the actual meaning of difficult words.
secondly
Linking Words
 ,they can store the important document related to
study
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 and check it whenever they want. since
,
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apply
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in
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education
Add an article
the education
show examples
Use synonyms
system
Add a comma
,system
show examples
 it is essential to carry heavy books because all the syllabus related to
study
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 is not available in one book.
Thidy
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They
 if students have their own pc it could be easier to store all the data. According to the
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recent
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resent
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recent
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 survey by the university of
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Cambridge
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cambridge
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,cambridge
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 it can be seen that in japan the accuracy rate of
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student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 in
Use synonyms
study
Add an article
the study
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 increased to high value because they
use
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
Add an article
the computer
a computer
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computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
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 for their
education
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.
on the other hand
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, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 some reason why
Use synonyms
use
Add an article
the use
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 of
computer
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 in
education
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
create
Change the verb form
creates
show examples
negative
Add an article
a negative
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 impact on learners.
firsty
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first
firstly
, if
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Add an article
a student
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student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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 always
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use
Change the verb form
uses
show examples
Use synonyms
Add an article
the computer
a computer
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computer
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computers
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 for
education
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 it is not good for their health because they could be suffered from eyesight
problem
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problems
show examples
 and they can
also
Linking Words
 pay little attention to physical activities.To explicate it, in
delhi
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Delhi
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 70% of
pupil
Fix the agreement mistake
pupils
show examples
use
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 specs because they suffered from eyesight
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 by
use
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computer
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 all the time. Keeping the above facts in view
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 believe that
Use synonyms
use
Correct article usage
the use
show examples
 of
Use synonyms
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
 is essential in
Use synonyms
education
Add an article
the education
show examples
system
Use synonyms
 but
too
Replace the word
to
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 some extent. If
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 urgent
requriement
Correct your spelling
requirement
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
Use synonyms
computer
Correct article usage
a computer
show examples
then
Linking Words
 they can
use
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 it but not always because young age is a golden time for students if they face health
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
this
Linking Words
 little age
then
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 they can not survive for
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 whole life. To put in a nutshell by dropping my pen down,
although
Linking Words
 there are some bad impact of using
Use synonyms
computer
Add an article
a computer
the computer
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 on
student
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 health
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
show examples
if learners can
use
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 pc for only
relavent
Correct your spelling
relevant
 purpose
then
Linking Words
 they can increase their level and skills.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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