IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The prevention of health problems and health illness is more important than treatment and medicine. Government funding should reflect this. To what extent do you agree?

#prevention #health #illness #treatment #medicine #government
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One point which I believe to be pivotal is the fact that prevention is better than cure. By maintaining proper
health
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,
people
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 can find themselves living longer, healthy
lives
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,
also
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 prohibition is cheaper in comparison with treatment during serious illness.
This
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 essay will discuss why
such
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 prevention is eventually essential and how government funding can help create
such
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 measures.I completely agree that
this
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 is the best way to tackle the issues of deteriorating public
health
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.
Health
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 maintenance typically consists of methods or activities that seek to reduce the predictable
health
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 problems and avoid medical treatments and medicine consumption.
This
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 method can reduce the significant economic burden of diseases.
In addition
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 to improving the length and quality of
people
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's
lives
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.
For example
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, tobacco consumption is injurious for
health
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; avoiding it and doing regular exercises and following other steps can significantly reduce your chances for illness or early death. Annual check-ups, as well as specific tests and screenings, are a few examples of preventive care. It
also
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 is called routine care and is vital to reduce predictable problems.
Hence
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 prevention care programs are required.
On the other hand
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, nations must provide funds to an allocated stream to improve their
people
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's
health
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. It will help in preserving uncertain fatal diseases
such
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 as COVID-19.
For instance
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, India is a vastly populated country;
however
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, less than 3 % of its GDP is spent on public
health
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;
on the contrary
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, countries like Canada spend more than 10 % of their GDP on public
health
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.
Thus
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, because of the shortage of resources, In April
,
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apply
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 2021, India had suffered
devastating
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the devastating
a devastating
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 loss of human
lives
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 during the
second
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 way of COVID-19. For all
such
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 reasons, government funding is a mandatory element in tackling
health
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 problems and maintaining good
health
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 for their community. To conclude,
People
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 are equally responsible for preventing their own
health
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 and following healthy measures.
However
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, there are some sections of the society
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 do not have enough funds to take early steps;
hence
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 it is the government's responsibility to allocate funds for their community to prevent their
persons
Change the noun form
person
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lives
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 during pandemic situations.
Submitted by niksmd1991 on

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