Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather that in secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages ?

It is believed that studying an international
language
at
primary
Correct article usage
the primary

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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level at
school
is more beneficial for pupils than learning it from secondary
school
. Even though there are various benefits to
this
, it
also
brings some demerits to students as well, which will be discussed at both points in the following essay. On the one hand, there are numerous benefits to
children
which
Correct pronoun usage
who

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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are able to learn a different
language
at primary
school
.
To begin
,
this
is
initial
Add an article
an initial
the initial

The noun phrase initial idea seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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idea to improve and achieve their
language
skills in future because
children
could easily learn knowledge and absorb several things from
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers

It seems that teacher may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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and parents normally taught them. Some teachers would start to teach them in another
language
,
for example
, basic English which
build
Change the verb form
builds

The plural verb build does not appear to agree with the singular subject basic English. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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up basic vocabulary
such
as animals stuff around them.
This
leads to
teach
Change the verb form
teaching

The verb teach may be in the wrong form after the preposition to. Consider changing it to the gerund form.

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them to love to study in foreign languages. Apart from
this
, another point is
primary
Add an article
a primary

The noun phrase primary school seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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school
with foreign
language
courses is
perfect
Add an article
the perfect
a perfect

The noun phrase perfect program seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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program for some parents who have insufficient time or knowledge about languages to teach by themselves. Most
of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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parents
Add an article
the parents

The phrase Most of parents may require the use of the article the. Consider inserting the before the noun in your sentence.

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hope that
school
will bring more effective
such
as for the primary level. Despite the positives to studying a foreign
language
since
children
were at primary
school
, some negative aspects need to consider.
First
of all, admission tuition for schools with foreign
language
programs is by far more expensive than other normal schools,
in addition
, some schools collect the extra fees for teaching by native teachers. A
further
point is that with grown
children
, it is easy to get distracted from friends or other activities in
school
, resulting in spending less time
to
Fix the infinitive
apply

It seems that the use of particle to may be incorrect here.

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concentrate learning other languages. In conclusion,
although
there are several advantages of starting learning an international
language
at primary
school
rather than learn at secondary
school
, there
also
are some drawbacks to
this
. If students learn a foreign
language
fast as they can, it is better to keep put knowledge to them to improve their skills and have well-paid careers in the future.
Therefore
, I believe that there
are
Change the verb form
is

The plural form of be are does not seem to agree with the singular subject more good. Consider changing the verb form.

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more good than bad points
of
Change preposition
about

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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this
.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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