Nowadays, many people are likely to over use internet and some of them even become addicted to it. What are reason for this? What problem can be cause by internet over use?

#people #internet #reason

In the modern world,humans communicate with each other and change information from anywhere throughout technology.But masses engage with the internet too much and even a few of them are even hooked to it.

This

essay will discuss the reasons behind

this

and how affect us. For sure, Wi-fi makes our life easier than before.

Moreover

, all bills become an automatic and with just one card you can do any payment.Even some people work from home just using a computer and makes millions, billions of dollars.

Besides

entertaining,video games,social media developed so much in recent years.It becomes tons of dollars business and companies wants to drag us and wants waste our time more and more. If people won't get rid of

this

addiction it will affect their health.

First

, sitting and watching the computer gives bad posture.In the long term, the brain can't get enough oxygen and had problems thinking or focus.

Second

, lack of physical activity eventually gain weight and eventually get heart disses

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Even had

Correct the article-noun agreement

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mental problems for isolating society. In conclusion, if we using the internet correctly it has so many benefits.But if we overuse it we maybe can kill our society for the computer.

Submitted by btfemx on Sat Jul 24 2021

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

193 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays, many people are likely to over use internet and some of them even become addicted to it. What are reason for this? What problem can be cause by internet over use?

Fully explain your ideas

With traffic jams and pollution increasing every year in big cities, some people say that public transport should be free in big cities to help reduce these problems which are caused by cars. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people are very strict about their school uniforms and the apprearance of their pupils, while other schools have a relaxed dress cod

The number of indigenous tribes living traditional lives in the world’s rainforests is decreasing. Within a few decades the last of these indigenous tribes may have disappeared forever. What are the causes of this problem and what can be done to prevent it from happening?

Today, many young people spend too much of their free time at shopping malls. This can be considered negative for young people and society generally. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

It is suggested that all young people should undertake a period of unpaid work to help people in the community. Does it bring more benefits or drawbacks to the community and the young people ?