IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #lives #change
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A persons
life
Use synonyms
 is as difficult as he thinks it is.
Accordingly
Linking Words
, some
people
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 like to live their lives in a set formation and they do not have the desire to
change
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 or take
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
 in their lives, whereas, some
people
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 believe in changing from
time
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 to
time
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 due to various reasons. I personally believe that a
person
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 should be ready to
change
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 himself with
time
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. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
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 we will discuss both kinds of
people
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 and try to justify the benefits of
change
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. There are
people
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 in my
life
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 who are completely satisfied with the level of
life
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 they have reached and they wish to live in their comfort zone. Though
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 there is nothing wrong
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
 doing what makes you happy, but a
person
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 should always be ready to look
the
Change preposition
at the
show examples
 world from a different perspective.
For instance
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, I knew a
person
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 named Sagar, who owned a restaurant in my town when I was in
my
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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secondary school. His
chinese
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Chinese
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 food was considered as the best in that period and every single
person
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 in my town loved his food. The only mistake that he
commited
Correct your spelling
committed
 is that he got satisfied with all the praise and one fine day when a competitor arrived in the market, Sagar could not compete with him and eventually, he had to shut his eatery. I believe that a
person
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 should try to adapt
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 changing times,
instead
Linking Words
 of forcing
time
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 to remain the same, because
time
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 is always ticking and it will not stop for anyone. We have to accept the changes around us and try to survive with
time
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.
For instance
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, if we look at the famous Bollywood actor
Mr.
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Mr
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 Amitabh Bacchan. Even though
,
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apply
show examples
 there were many well know actors from his generation, but he is the only one who has survived in between today's young generation of
actor
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actors
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 and
people
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 still cherish his presence on screen. The only reason behind
this
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 acceptance of
people
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 is the art of
change
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 that he has learnt with
time
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 and the way he has revolutionised himself over
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time
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 to stay with the competition. In conclusion, I will only state one thing that we are temporary
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 in
this
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 world,
thus
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 we should always be open to every challenge
life
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 throws at us and try to stay with
time
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 to attain success.
Submitted by naman.gadhia on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • status quo
  • stagnation
  • routine
  • comfort zone
  • predictability
  • specialization
  • innate
  • personal growth
  • adaptability
  • fast-paced
  • new horizons
  • equilibrium
  • progress
  • dynamic
  • transformation
What to do next:
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