IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In the past, most people used to travel to their place of work. With increased use of computers, the internet and smart phones, more and more people are starting to work from home. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

#people #travel #place #work #computers #internet #phones #home #development
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As the world is becoming digital,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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people
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 are taking immense
advantages
Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
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 of it and one of the
example
Change to a plural noun
examples
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 of
that is
Linking Words
 doing
work
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 from
home
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.
This
Linking Words
 essay will throw some light on the advantages and disadvantages of the
work
Use synonyms
 from
home
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. On the one hand. Some
people
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 who have
computer based
Add a hyphen
computer-based
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 jobs prefer to
work
Use synonyms
 from
home
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 as they can save up a lot of commute time and get considerable time to spend with their near and dear ones.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
,Also
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 they end up saving a lot of energy by not travelling to their
workplace
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work
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hence
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 becoming more productive in their works. It gives individuals
flexibility
Add an article
the flexibility
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 to
work
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 from any corner of the world opening the doors for the
people
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 worldwide to grab the opportunity at their dream company. It even makes
easy
Correct pronoun usage
it easy
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 for the industries to find the right talents by expanding their search for the same globally.
On the other hand
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,
Bunch
Correct article usage
a Bunch
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 of
people
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 think the
work
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 from
home
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 comes with a
lot
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oflot
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 challenges. Sometimes It becomes difficult to have coordination within the team and convey the tasks or ideas. It
also
Linking Words
 pushes
the
Correct article usage
apply
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people
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 towards
more
Correct article usage
a more
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 sedentary lifestyle causing
adverse
Correct article usage
an adverse
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 impact on
ones
Change to a genitive case
one's
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 health. There is ample evidence of
escalation
Add an article
an escalation
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 in cases of
people
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 suffering from obesity, hypertension etc over the past few years. To conclude with the above argument, I firmly believe that advantages of the working from
home
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outweighs
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outweigh
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 its disadvantages bringing
the
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apply
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people
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 worldwide together by the means of
the
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apply
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work
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 and making the workplace excellent by hiring incredible talents and expertise.
Submitted by northpole_43420 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • telecommuting
  • virtual collaboration
  • work-life balance
  • productivity
  • flexibility
  • commuting
  • isolation
  • disconnect
  • coordination
  • boundaries
  • distractions
  • remote work
What to do next:
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