IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Children should never be educated at home by their parents do you agree or disagree ? Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

#children #home #parents #people
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Many believe that young ones should never take care
by
Change preposition
of by
show examples
the
Change the word
their
show examples
parents
Use synonyms
 in
education
Use synonyms
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement because always
home
Use synonyms
education
Use synonyms
 has
an
Change the article
a
show examples
prominant
Correct your spelling
prominent
 value in educating the present generation . In
this
Linking Words
 essay,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will discuss the merits and demerits points for the trend followers. Admittedly, changes are taking place in the
system
Use synonyms
 of
education
Use synonyms
 as
younger
Correct article usage
the younger
show examples
 generation always think that they need to follow teachers instructions.
Firstly
Linking Words
 and foremost,
reason
Add an article
the reason
show examples
 is that
child
Use synonyms
 always prefer independent work and think that working
parents
Use synonyms
does
Change the verb form
do
show examples
 not have any time to respond and clarify their doubts.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 becomes
challenging
Add an article
a challenging
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situation
Use synonyms
 in dealing with problems.
Secondly
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, in the schools teachers expect their students to do work without depending upon the other person.
For instance
Linking Words
, 80% of students work including class assignments are done with the respective class teachers in
todays
Correct your spelling
today's
 educational
instituitions
Correct your spelling
institutions
.
Finally
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,
parents
Use synonyms
 think that their children having some problems in coping with the difficult
situation
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.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they prefer
Use synonyms
Add an article
the child
a child
show examples
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
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 to do
Add an article
the task
show examples
task
Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
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 independently.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, youngsters always prefer to socialize, physically and
also
Linking Words
 they need moral support in the future.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some others think that their
child
Use synonyms
need
Change the verb form
needs
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educated
Change the verb form
to be educated
educating
show examples
 by
parents
Use synonyms
 at
home
Use synonyms
 because in the school
system
Use synonyms
 they cannot provide 100%
education
Use synonyms
 for their
child
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, they think that children
needs
Change the verb form
need
show examples
 care and
education
Use synonyms
 personally at
home
Use synonyms
 apart from the school
system
Use synonyms
. To deal with emotional and mentally challenged
Use synonyms
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
 young ones need
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
support from their caregivers.
Moreover
Linking Words
, today generations are getting changed and always prefer social life. To conclude, children need to remember that
parents
Use synonyms
 are always supporters and
decision makers
Add a hyphen
decision-makers
show examples
.
Although
Linking Words
 there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
number
Change the article
a number
the number
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 of changes in
school
Correct article usage
the school
show examples
system
Use synonyms
home
Use synonyms
education
Use synonyms
 has
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 prominent place from
past
Correct article usage
the past
show examples
 to the present
situation
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by ar050682 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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