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Band 5.5

Wild animals have no place in the 21st century and protection of wild animal is waste of resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#animals #place #st #century #protection #waste #resources
In efforts to conserve extinct species, forest departments throughout the world have been spending a lot these days.
On the contrary
, some people think that it is a waste of money and
human
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humans
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 can live without other creatures in the modern world. I completely refute
this
 opinion as these animals help maintain the healthy balance of nature, and
thus
 provide a sustainable environment for a man to live in.
To begin
 with, every animal has its own place in the food chain of every natural habitat, and without them, there will be serious repercussions on the natural phenomena. All living organisms, including human beings, depend on each other for their survival. Snakes, for
an
Correct article usage
apply
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instance, aid in improving the quality of the fertile soil in farms, when they crawl through the soil bundles,
beaking
Correct your spelling
breaking
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 them into
finest
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the finest
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 particles, which are ideal for a plantation.
However
, the fall in the snake population in recent years is causing less nutritive crops
such
 as wheat and rice to name a few.
Therefore
, it becomes extremely important to protect
such
 wild animals, which will ultimately benefit human life.
Furthermore
, if a particular member of
wildlife
Correct article usage
a wildlife
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 habitat is missing,
then
 their predators can cause detrimental harm to people living nearby in search of food. It is not uncommon to see wild animals like a tiger sprawling its hunt in villages near forest areas. A few months ago, there was a case near Dajipur
wildlife sanctuary
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Wildlife Sanctuary
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 when
the
Correct article usage
a
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 Wild Cat attacked
the
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a
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 child in Radhanagari hamlet, and it was found hungry
as a result
 of a reduced population of monkeys, which was the primary prey for it.
Hence
, efforts taken to protect wildlife are worth the life of some humans. To recapitulate, all species are part of nature and extremely valuable in maintaining the earth at its best.
Moreover
, it is particularly essential to protect them to save human
life
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lives
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 before the situation gets exacerbated.
Submitted by mmritesh1 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each body paragraph focuses on a single main idea and supports it with relevant details and examples to improve logical structure and coherence.
task achievement
Provide a more thorough analysis of the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement to strengthen task achievement and clear comprehensive ideas.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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