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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Many foods are shipped from far away. Some people think that eating local food is more environmentally and economically. Do you think the advantages outweigh its disadvantages?

#foods #people #food
Lot
Change the article
A lot
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 of
food
 items nowadays are exported from far away places. Some people believe that consuming local
food
 items like fruits, vegetables, sweets etc. is better for
economy
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the economy
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 as well as
environment
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the environment
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. I believe that having local
food
 definitely has more advantages compared to shipped
food
 and
this
 essay will shed more light on it. On one
hand
Add a comma
,hand
show examples
 having local
food
 has its fair share of advantages.
Firstly
, it is good for
local
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the local
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economy
. The more people consume homegrown
food
,
more
Correct article usage
the more
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 will be the supply and in
turn
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,turn
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 the local
economy
 will benefit.
This
 in turn will help local farmers and merchants economically.
Secondly
, shipped
food
 always have extra shipping cost attached to it,
in addition
 to, the extra taxes levied by the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
.
This
in
Add the comma(s)
,in
show examples
 turn, increases the cost of the
food
.
Thirdly
, shipped edibles are usually packaged, which is found
do
Correct your spelling
to
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 have detrimental effects on human health. Fourthly, it is found that shipped
food
 is subjected to added flavours and
colors
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colours
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 in order to maintain its freshness which is again not good for health.
For example
, it is found that green apples which are imported in India are found to have high citrus elements which means they are not good for health.
On the other hand
, having only local refreshments does have its
Correct your spelling
fair
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fare
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fair
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 share of disadvantages.
Firstly
, locals get to eat
variety
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a variety
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 of items
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 are usually not available locally. With the emergency of e-commerce, people now have access to foreign brands
such
 as Hershey's and Snickers chocolates which were not available before.
Secondly
,
this
 is
also
 good for
national
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the national
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economy
 because local
food
 will be shipped internationally.
For example
, Kashmiri Apples and Assam tea
,
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apply
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 is famous in foreign countries, which has helped
Indian
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the Indian
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economy
. As a matter of fact, India is one of the largest exporters of Tea in the world. Having shipped
food
 definitely has its fair share of pros and cons but in my belief, the advantages far outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by rananjayrajw1 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • carbon emissions
  • transportation
  • environmentally friendly
  • economically beneficial
  • local farmers
  • local economy
  • fresher
  • nutritious
  • food security
  • imports
  • preserving
  • traditional farming practices
  • biodiversity
  • limited variety
  • availability
  • cost
  • contributor
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