IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many cities around the world these days are becoming more and more polluted. Why is this happening? What solutions can you suggest?

#cities #world
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Present days
pollution
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 levels in urban
areas
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 keep increasing because of many human activities.
This
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 essay will discuss two prime causes of
this
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 problem, namely the increase in
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population level
Add a hyphen
population-level
show examples
 and unplanned
development
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 programs.
Moreover
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,
this
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 essay will
also
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 discuss the measures for these issues,
such
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 as the
government
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 awareness campaigns and strong regulations on
development
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plans
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.
Increasing
Correct article usage
The increasing
show examples
population
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 possesses a high threat to the cleanliness of city
areas
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. As metro
cities
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 offer sizable job opportunities to people from the surrounding villages and semi-urban
areas
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, employees tend to migrate inside
cities
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.
Consequently
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,
the
Change the word
their
show examples
population
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 level
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
increases to a large scale, which leads to the emergence of crowded and polluted zones. The
next
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 countable cause might be the lack of zone wise
development
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 programs.
For example
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, if an industry is located at the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 of a residential area and emitted polluted smoke and effluent,
then
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 it will be a serious threat
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the resident’s health conditions and living environment. Altogether, the
population
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control
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 and zone wise
development
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plans
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 should be encountered properly by the
government
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 to avoid
further
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 damages to the environment in city
areas
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. In spite of an increase in inhabitants, the
government
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 can
control
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pollution
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 by providing regular awareness among people regarding waste management.
For instance
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, if authorities deliver specific guidance regarding waste disposal methods,
then
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 the management of trash will become effortless.
As a result
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, land or soil
pollution
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 due to domestic wastes can be decreased to a significant level.
Similarly
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, urban
development
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plans
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 play a vital role in
pollution
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control
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. Forecasting
plans
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 for several decades are necessary in case of
commencement
Correct article usage
the commencement
show examples
 of an industry and the expansions of roads.
For example
Linking Words
, Industrial
areas
Use synonyms
 should be developed in the other corners of the city, where accommodation of citizens is not present. As a whole, tight measures by the
government
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 may result in
pollution
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-free metropolises. The hazardous things present and increase in many
cities
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 around the world is becoming a major problem for humankind. Regularly organized
government
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 awareness programs and suitable infrastructure
development
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 laws will be the great solutions to
control
Use synonyms
 debris in populated
areas
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 and ineffective building regulation laws in
cities
Use synonyms
, which are the main causes for serious environmental contamination.
Submitted by Manoj on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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