IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

Education is not a luxury, but a basic human right and as such should be free for everyone irrespective of personal wealth. Do you agree or disagree?

#education #luxury #right #wealth
It is a contentious issue in the
community
 that, learning is a basic human right.
In addition
, it should not be charged despite personal wealth since by the end of the day it is not a bed of roses.
First
 of all, a society with learned people develops
as a result
 it is in a position to contribute positively towards improving the
community
.
Nevertheless
, wherever everyone in the society can afford
education
Add an article
an education
show examples
 is an added merit as they can have a common understanding by
this
, they will all have knowledge and skill.
For instance
, in Britain learning is free
thus
 there is
100
Correct article usage
a 100
show examples
% transition to free
education
.
Moreover
, the children have developed knowing that there is no negotiation about going to school to study.
Therefore
 free
education
 has facilitated
well-being
Correct article usage
the well-being
show examples
 of the
community
 in that children can all attend school.
Secondly
, despite the wealthy
community
 have a notion that free
education
 is substandard as
such
 teachers are not motivated to be productive.
Hence
 they opt to pay for the
education
 as they claim it is quality. A research that was done by
University
Correct article usage
the University
show examples
 of India,
Education
 Department shows that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 80% of parents prefer private schools where they pay fees.
Therefore
,
this
indicate
Change the verb form
indicates
show examples
 that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 they don’t believe in free
education
 and in
this
 case those who cannot afford to pay for
such
 kind of learning
feels
Change the verb form
feel
show examples
 secluded when they intermingle with other students leading to some kind of relaxation toward
education
, replacing it with other chores.
Submitted by Sabina Hamisi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fundamental right
  • accessible
  • social mobility
  • personal and professional development
  • overall development
  • equality
  • social disparities
  • access
What to do next:
Look at other essays: