People who cause their own illnesses through unhealthy lifestyles and poor diets should have to pay more for health care. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #illnesses #lifestyles #diets #health #care

In these present times, healthcare costs are rising due to the growth in modern diseases and viruses which are effect by harmful routines. These lifestyles include disadvantaged nutrition, smoking and lack of exercise.

However

, I partially agree with

this

statement.

Thus

, in

this

essay, both sides of

this

issue will be discussed.

People

who have unhealthy daily life like to ignore their fitness e.g. smoking, drink alcohol, consume

high fat

Add a hyphen

high-fat

show examples

dish

Fix the agreement mistake

dishes

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, and so on.

Moreover

, the major of deceases are occur from personal behaviour. As the result, human has unusual symptoms and go to

hospital

Add an article

the hospital

show examples

to cure.

Then

, persons who get sick should spend more than the well – being person because the treatment expenditure include medicines, services from the medical

center

Change the spelling

centre

show examples

, lab test, and etc.

For instance

, the office man who love to do their work overtime

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

does not allocate time to work out

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and devours junk foods is affected

from

Change preposition

show examples

cancer.

Finally

this

man uses his saving money for the treatment. While

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

healthy

people

do not matter to disburse for curing.

In contrast

, all

people

should spread on welfare from the government to approach

Remove the article

apply

show examples

public health because it must be the basis of privilege for all.

Hence

, it will disagree in

this

issue whatever you have a weak condition or strong physique, we must deserve thoroughly in public health services. It can illustrate which sickness

people

should be cured of government healthcare at

the

Correct article usage

show examples

suitable price and do not cash in the extra bills. In conclusion, from my perspective, I agree with the statement because everyone should care yourselves in order to spend additional for remedy and help to reduce emergency patients.

Submitted by northpole_43420 on Thu Aug 05 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

275 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

burden
lifestyle-related diseases
healthcare systems
personal responsibility
preventable diseases
healthcare costs
ethical considerations
penalizing
discrimination
socio-economic groups
deterrent
health education
financial penalties
health inequalities
access to healthcare
preventive medicine
public health goals
promoting healthy lifestyles

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People who cause their own illnesses through unhealthy lifestyles and poor diets should have to pay more for health care. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this a positive or negative thing?

In some cultures, children are often told they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advanages and disadvantages of gibing children this message?

The prevention of health problems and illness is more important than treatment and medicine. Government funding should reflect this. To what extent do you agree?

In some countries children have very strict rules of behaviour, in other countries, they are allowed to do almost anything they want. To what extent should children have to follow rules?