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Writing Samples
Band 5

The dangers of smoking are well known, yet many people continue with this habit. What are the causes of this? How can we reduce smoking in society?

#dangers #people #habit #society
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It has been suggested that topic for discussion, more
people
Use synonyms
 have got data about the hazards of smoking,
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however
Add a comma
,however
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 they don't refuse from
this
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 process. We will discuss reasons and solving rules.
To begin
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 with the reasons. As a matter of fact, the various causes can be discovered by each person who has
this
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 habit.
Firstly
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, as far as I know,
people
Use synonyms
 admire smoking when there are various negative consequences in their jobs or duties,
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moreover
Add a comma
,moreover
show examples
 they get unsuccessful results any jobs and so on. As a pattern, in fact, the loving life can't be understood by
people
Use synonyms
 sometimes, many
people
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direct
Replace the word
directly
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 to the cigarettes.
Furthermore
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, young
people
Use synonyms
 are pressured by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
family members, if they can't get
luck
Replace the word
lucky
show examples
 in
this
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 process, much time they direct different hazardous habits and unfortunately, one of them is
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
smoking. Let us take a look at the solving ways. I am of the opinion that, there are some processes for dropping off. Many
people
Use synonyms
 consider that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the protective measures should be realized by the governments like the amount of tax has to be increased by the country, different bans must be enforced for the selling and the age limit ought to be enforced and so on. Recently, the young utilize more than before time, I believe strongly, while the measures use(d),
firstly
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, to the young should be paid attention. Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 they are
future
Correct article usage
the future
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 for every country. Taking everything into consideration, the smoking level will be decreased by the protective enactments,
nevertheless
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 preventing is impossible absolutely. Everybody is to avoid
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
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 habit and to heed their healthy.
Submitted by aydin.quliyev2001 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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