The charts below show the levels of participation in education and science in developing and industrialised countries in 1980 and 1990.

The charts below show the levels of participation in education and science in developing and industrialised countries in 1980 and 1990.
The bar charts illustrate the levels of participation in education and science in developing and industrialised
countries
during a decade
started
Change the form of the verb
starting
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from
Change preposition
in
show examples
1980.
It is clear that
the industrialised
countries
were superior in all the aspects which the developing
countries
showed less. In the initial year, the average
years
of schooling in the industrialised
countries
stood at 8.3
years
, and it increased significantly until 10.2
years
.
Hence
, the high level of the average
years
of schooling, the number of scientists and technicians per 1000 people were 42 (1980) and 65 (1990). One thing that obviously caused it since the aforementioned
countries
were spending a large amount on Research and Development. Approximately $160
billions
Correct your spelling
billion
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in 1980 and rose almost triple
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the end of the decade ($350
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
).
On the other hand
, the levels of participation in education and science in developing
countries
showed the opposite. Since they
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
only invested less
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
Research and Development in the initial year ($60
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
) and decreased to
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half in 1990 affected the average
years
of schooling were
minority
Add an article
a minority
the minority
show examples
. In 1980, only 2.3
years
and there was a slight increase after a decade (3.8
years
). So
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
, per 1000 only found a small number of scientists and technicians. No more
that
Correct word choice
than
show examples
20 specialists in both
field
Fix the agreement mistake
fields
show examples
throughout the
years
.
Submitted by faradienaf on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 80%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words countries, years with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • enrollment rates
  • primary education
  • secondary education
  • tertiary education
  • literacy rates
  • scientific research
  • research and development (R&D)
  • correlation
  • gender disparities
  • participation
  • developing countries
  • industrialized countries
  • investment
  • comparison
  • impact
  • specified years
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