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Band 5.5

Overpopulation of urban areas has created a number of problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems? Give your reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.

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Cities have been facing significant numbers of difficulties owing to the increase in
people
's population.
This
 essay will examine the main
problems
 of overpopulation and the possible solutions for
this
 problem. The main critical problem is the congestion of
roads
. The city has always been a place full of crowdedness ,especially in the rush hours, thereby increasing the traffic jams.
For example
, between 7 and 8 o'clock in the
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
morning all the
roads
 and subways are packed with
people
 on their way to commute. 
Additionally
, one of the most challenging
problems
 in urban is the impact of
pollution
 on citizens.
In other words
, due to the influences of air
pollution
,
people
 have been experiencing incurable diseases that mainly affect the respiratory system because of the continuous breathing of impure air;
furthermore
,  sound
pollution
 has been giving similar drawbacks. The elderly
people
 who live in  cities have lots of auditory disabilities because of the high volume of sounds surrounding them. 
However
, there are some possible solutions that nations and individuals could make to improve these
problems
.
Firstly
, the government should construct new
roads
;
consequently
, decreasing the congestion. In 2007,
for instance
, the Japanese government built new bridges that cover almost every part of Tokyo.
Thus
, reduce the overcrowded
roads
. 
Moreover
, the government could encourage 
people
 to plant new trees in order to purify the surrounding atmosphere, as increasing the greenery areas would potentially have a great effect on
people
's health, and obviously decreases chronic diseases. In conclusion,
problems
 have been created in cities due to the surge of
people
's number which has had some serious effects
such
 as crowdedness and
pollution
 ;
however
,  we can significantly lessen
this
 by new track construction and afforestation.
Submitted by faradienaf on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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