The old generation often hold traditional ideas about the correct way of life, thinking and behavior. However, some people think that these ideas are not helpful for young people to prepare for modern life. To what extent do agree or disagree?

People
divided the correct
way
of
life
old ones traditional
ideas
are best.On the other ,hand few individuals believe
this
concept is not beneficial to youngsters to be ready for the modern world.In recent
decade
Fix the agreement mistake
decades
show examples
internet changed our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
so much lot of traditional
thinks
Correct your spelling
things
show examples
developed so I personally agree with the second concept. First
foremost
Correct word choice
and foremost
show examples
, all humans are different from
others
Change noun form
others'
other's
show examples
paths, experiences,
views
Correct word choice
and views
show examples
of
life
even where they come from.
Then
trying to hold old traditional theories about the correct
way
of a live an entire population is impossible.For ,example one young adult girl living his
life
the correct
way
away from drugs but she got cancer at 22 old so she
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
to shave his hair
however
people
when
looking
Verb problem
apply
show examples
in public
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
judge her for inappropriate hair but she didn't choose that hairstyle.
Therefore
holding all human beings to judge and hold them is not the correct step
Secondly
,
people
live in a fast-paced world and democratic society so holding
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
ideas
or judging
way
Correct article usage
the way
show examples
looks
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look
show examples
is inappropriate.In some nations
created
Wrong verb form
creating
show examples
and
added their
Wrong verb form
adding
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law to not judge or
forcing
Wrong verb form
force
show examples
your
ideas
is legal.
For example
Sweden there is a law that
force
Correct subject-verb agreement
forces
show examples
to get dressed charge 500$ it may sound ridiculous but there are a lot of countries adding it up.
Consequently
holding
ideas
about the correct
way
to
life
is becoming illegal. In conclusion,
this
idea is not suitable for all
people
because the
way
of
life
is changing from time to time.Especially nowadays thinking about 10 years from now humans changed our view too.Personally, I believe forcing 7 billion
people
to live the same is impossible when if
people
trying
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try
show examples
it becomes socialism.The Soviets showed that it
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
hopeless so it
is
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was
show examples
not helpful at all
Submitted by btfemx on

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task response
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coherence and cohesion
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. The progression of ideas is unclear, and there is limited use of linking words and cohesive devices. This affects the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay.

Your opinion

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