IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant
#two #maps #show #road #access #city #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The given diagram illustrates and compares
road
 access to a
city
 hospital in
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 2007 and in 2010 after the redevelopment plan. In
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 2007, there was a single
road
 that connected
Correct article usage
the hospital
show examples
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
 to
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
road
Fix the agreement mistake
roads
show examples
. People could enter from either
hospital
Correct article usage
the hospital
show examples
road
 or the gate where combined parking used to be. Combine parking consisted of parking for
public
Add an article
the public
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as well as
 staff. Six
indivdual
Correct your spelling
individual
 bus stops could be located, three on either side of
hospital
Correct article usage
the hospital
show examples
road
. By 2010, there were major changes. To tackle
increased
Add an article
an increased
the increased
show examples
 load of vehicles,
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
new public parking was found situated east
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the hospital.
Old
Add an article
The old
show examples
 parking lot was assigned to staff members only. There were two new
roundabout
Change to a plural noun
roundabouts
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 on hospital
road
 to deal with traffic joining
ring
Correct article usage
the ring
show examples
road
 and
city
road
. A dedicated bus station was introduced west to the hospital
road
.
To sum up
, in just three years,
major
Add an article
a major
show examples
 development occurred which was
due to
increased
Correct article usage
an increased
show examples
 number of people coming to
city
Add an article
the city
a city
show examples
hospital
Fix the agreement mistake
hospitals
show examples
. It
also
 indicates that more people got injured in 2010 when compared to 2007.
Submitted by mailtoritika.chandwani on

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words road, city with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compares" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • traffic flow
  • road access
  • ring road
  • bus stops
  • bus station
  • congestion
  • parking facilities
  • pedestrian crossings
  • vehicular flow
  • organizational structure
  • accessibility
  • enhancements
  • configuration
  • dedicated
  • diverting traffic
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