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Band 6

There are many advertisements directed at children, such as snacks, toys, and other goods. Parents argue that children are under pressure. Advertisers claim that advertisements provide useful information. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#advertisements #children #snacks #toys #goods #parents #pressure #advertisers #information
Advertisements
 are a common tool for merchants to promote their
products
.
Although
 they can help customers better understand the information about commodities,
advertisements
 can cause negative effects.
Advertisements
 can break a family’s relationship.
Children
 may be attracted by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
advertisements
 with interesting images and put pressure on their
parents
 to buy them toys or snacks introduced on the screen.
However
, for some less well-off families,
parents
 can not afford the cost.
As a result
,
children
 may be upset and dispute with their
parents
. Disputes sometimes can damage a family.
On the other hand
,
advertisements
 could provide people with detailed information about commodities. They can help people choose
products
 they really need. Meanwhile, there are normally some useful
products
 but lack of publicity. Advertisement can help customers realize these fantastic
products
 and benefit their life. I agree that
advertisements
 should be regulated because they are likely to result in fierce competition between
children
. Many
children
 lack the ability to judge if the commodity they really need. Sometimes, they are motivated by sheer vanity to achieve a sense of self-satisfaction. Other
children
 may be influenced by them and claim new toys and snacks from their
parents
 to compete with each other.
Consequently
,
this
 competition will lead to a negative consuming habit and affect their
further
 consumption negatively. In conclusion, despite
advertisements
 are a good source for people to absorb information, I suggest that they should be regulated. Because
advertisements
 could mislead young
children
 to consume and compete and cause financial pressure on less well-off families.
Submitted by 1404654525 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • vulnerable
  • impressionability
  • materialistic
  • constant exposure
  • pester power
  • savvy consumers
  • family discussions
  • regulated
  • exploiting
  • age-appropriate
  • ethical manner
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