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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shred freely. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #information #research #world
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It is believed by
some
Capitalize word
Some
show examples
 that sharing all data about scientific research or study brings benefits to the
world
while
 others say it is better to keep some
information
 secret and not spread it out. In the following paragraphs, both viewpoints and my opinion will be discussed before a conclusion is reached.
To begin
 with, it is true that providing the
world
 with
knowledge
 and
information
 from research will help people stay updated. Some research combined with the latest
knowledge
 in the
world
 has never been published before. It will be helpful to the
world
 to acknowledge things that have occurred in recent years or are going to happen in the future.
For instance
, the publishing of
information
 about endangered species can help people to notice their actions and how to address the problems.
On the contrary
, some
information
 is dangerous and will harm our society if it is shared,
for example
, the making of nuclear bombs. If communities all around the
world
 understand the procedures and methods of how those bombs are made,
besides
, they will definitely make their own bomb and sell them to other countries. In the worst case, the bomb will be used in wars between countries. In my opinion, some useful
information
 and
knowledge
 need to be shared with the
world
such
 as the extinction of creatures to let people understand and find a way to ease the problems together.
On the other hand
, dangerous
knowledge
such
 as making weapons needs to be kept secret and protected from misuse which will have bad effects on our
world
. In conclusion, we need to prior which
information
 is able to spread to the
world
 and which one is not.
Submitted by nnatthinee on

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Example Development
Try to develop your ideas further with more detailed examples. While the ones provided do offer support, deeper exploration could make your argument more persuasive.
Balance and Depth in Discussion
Ensure a balance between both views before stating your opinion to provide a more nuanced discussion.
Introduction & Conclusion
Your essay effectively introduces and concludes the topic, providing a clear structure that guides the reader.
Clear Opinion Presentation
You presented a clear opinion, making your stance known which is good for task achievement.
Logical Structure
The logical structure of your essay, with distinct paragraphs for each viewpoint, aids in understanding and following your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Scientific research
  • Academic world
  • Information sharing
  • Innovation
  • Progress
  • Accessible
  • Discoveries
  • Global issues
  • Education
  • Equal opportunities
  • Sensitive information
  • Privacy
  • Security
  • Intellectual property
  • Confidential data
  • Misuse
  • Misinterpretation
  • Misinformation
  • Ethical issues
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