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Band 5.5

Some people think that one should plan detailed activities for their leisure time, others disagree with that. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #plan #activities #leisure #time
People
’s opinions differ as to whether they should make
plans
 for the
activities
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
 they will be involved in their leisure
time
 or not. While having no
plans
 in place can help them relax better, I believe that making detailed
plans
 in advance is more beneficial. It is true that random-based engagement in their free
time
 can relax them better. It is generally acknowledged that most
people
 are restricted by various kinds of goals, rules or
plans
,
such
 as completing specific tasks within a specified
time
 period or finishing learning certain subjects on a fixed) timetable.
This
 is the root cause of the extreme levels of stress which the vast majority of individuals are struggling with. Under
this
 circumstance, if they have made specific
plans
 for their
activities
 in forthcoming holidays,
this
 will become goal-oriented and another task like work or study making it harder for them to relax.
This
 is why some reputable corporations have established free areas where employees can arrange their
activities
 based on their preference, without the need to plan in advance, and they believe that
this
 is a more effective way of dispersing their exhaustion and releasing work pressure.
On the other hand
, I agree with the view that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
leisure
time
 should be planned for the sake of using their
time
 efficiently. To be more specific, it is common for numerous
people
 to learn
playing
Change the verb form
to play
show examples
 instruments or a
second
 language in their free
time
, and the prerequisites of making progress in
such
endeavors
Change the spelling
endeavours
show examples
 are long
time
 dedication and detailed
plans
.
In addition
, in contemporary settings, it is a norm for
people
 to travel to a tourist destination in their leisure
time
.
However
, most
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 attractions are not open round the clock, so it is necessary for them to make relevant
plans
 according to the business
time
 of those attractions.
This
 way, they can avoid wasting
time
 by visiting those places during their closed hours. In conclusion, while
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
random involvement in some
activities
 in their free
time
 can relax
people
 better, the purposes of that involvement are not confined to relaxation, and they can reap more benefits from making
plans
 in advance.
Submitted by Marker & Kaohom on

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    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • leisure time
  • detailed activities
  • making the most
  • variety of experiences
  • waste of time
  • over-scheduling
  • spontaneity
  • relaxation
  • increase stress
  • balanced approach
  • impromptu decisions
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