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Band 5.5

Some people think that wild animals should not be kept in Zoos. Others, believe that there are good reasons of having Zoos. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #animals #zoos
Zoos are common around the world. Some people are of the view that they should not be kept in captivity, whereas others believe that these wild creatures should be kept in wild parks as there are some advantages to that.
This
 essay discusses both views and
give
Change the verb form
gives
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 an opinion. On one hand, wild parks cause stress to wild species. In most cases, these animals are used to their natural habitat where their movements or food types are not restricted or limited.
For example
, big cats
such
 as elephants or lions move from one national
park like
Add a hyphen
park-like
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 Masai Mara national park to Serengeti in
such
of
Change preposition
apply
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prey. These are ecosystems linked to each other
hence
 facilitating the movement of wild animals from the north to south and vice versa.
However
, enclosing them within a particular area, which is small, limits their move,
hence
 making them stressed.
On the other hand
, zoos provide protection for animals that are on the verge of extinction. All around the world, there are creatures whose products are of high value. They are constantly poached and their products
such
 as skin and tusks are moved around the world.
As a result
 of
this
 illegal trading, the wild population of these species keep on declining.
For instance
, the existence of rhinos and elephants in Kenya are threatened. It is
therefore
 paramount to keep them in captivity so as to protect their population. In my opinion, not every wild species should be in wild parks. Those that their existence is on the line should only be kept in the zoos, whereas those whose wild population is not threatened should always be in the wild.
Submitted by mtyree9893 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • captivity
  • natural habitat
  • artificial enclosures
  • genetic diversity
  • animal welfare
  • conservation efforts
  • endangered species
  • biodiversity
  • education platform
  • breeding programs
  • reintroduction
  • psychological suffering
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