IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Advertisements are becoming more and more common in everyday life. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#advertisements #life #development
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In today's materialistic world, advertising is one of the most important
tool
Change to a plural noun
tools
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 for marketing.
Companies
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 advertise their
products
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 on various platforms to promote sales and indeed it has been proved profitable by doing so. In my opinion,
this
Linking Words
 trend has more of a negative impact on society. We will be discussing
about
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apply
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the drawback in
this
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 essay.
To begin
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 with,
people
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 come across advertisements almost everywhere, whether it is while watching a video, reading or just walking on the street. Many of these have immoral content which is unacceptable to society. Tobacco and alcoholic beverage producing
companies
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 promoting their
products
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 can influence teenagers to get addicted to these bad habits. Though some countries have strict regulations on showcasing
such
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 content on any
forms
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form
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 of media, These
companies
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 market their brand through other accessories.
For instance
Linking Words
, India has banned
advertisement
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the advertisement
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 of tobacco and alcohol
products
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,
Therefore
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 these
companies
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 promote their brand through music
cd's
Change the noun form
CDs
cd
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 and soda beverages.
Secondly
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, Advertisements can
presuade
Correct your spelling
persuade
people
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 for unnecessary spending. The demand for Luxurious
products
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 which are mostly beyond affordability can have a negative effect financially.
For example
Linking Words
, Apple
iphones
Correct your spelling
iPhones
iPhone
 adverts are so compelling that
people
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 purchase these irrespective of the price.
Moreover
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,
Many
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many
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 of these adverts can be
exaggeration
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an exaggeration
the exaggeration
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 of the actual product
such
Linking Words
 as
,
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apply
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 Health
products
Use synonyms
 convincing
people
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 that their
products
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 can make them healthy irrespective of the importance of exercise and
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
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 diet. Whereas some showing medical plants in their advert
,
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apply
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 can be easily mistaken for
herbal
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an herbal
the herbal
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product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
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 by customers. In conclusion, I believe that advertisements have a negative effect on the customers since most of them only show the bright side of the picture,
ingnoring
Correct your spelling
ignoring
 the possible harmful effects it can have on the consumers.
Submitted by roshan.rebello22 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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