IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?

People
Use synonyms
 like
films
Use synonyms
 from other countries because they are
more big
Correct word choice
bigger
show examples
 and more interesting. They have better action scenes
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 the actors are very famous
people
Use synonyms
. Local
films
Use synonyms
sometimes
Verb problem
are sometimes
show examples
is
Verb problem
apply
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boring and
have always
Correct word order
always have
show examples
 the same type of story. The foreign
films
Use synonyms
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 more exciting
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 they have new ideas.
This
Linking Words
 is why many
people
Use synonyms
 watch
films
Use synonyms
 from outside their country. They want to see something different
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 they like the new look of these
films
Use synonyms
.I think the
government
Use synonyms
 must give
money
Use synonyms
 to the local
film
Use synonyms
 industry. If the
government
Use synonyms
 give more
money
Use synonyms
, local
films
Use synonyms
 can be good like foreign
films
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is important for the country because the culture must
stay
Fix capitalization
Stay
show examples
 strong. When there is more
money
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, the
film
Use synonyms
 industry can
make
Verb problem
create
show examples
 more jobs for
people
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 local actors can be famous too.But some
people
Use synonyms
 say that the
government
Use synonyms
 must not give
money
Use synonyms
. They think
films
Use synonyms
 must be good
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their own. The
government
Use synonyms
 must use
money
Use synonyms
 for more important things like food, schools or better roads. If the
film
Use synonyms
 industry is bad, they must change and improve alone. If the
film
Use synonyms
 is not good,
people
Use synonyms
not
Verb problem
will not
show examples
 watch it, and
this
Linking Words
 is the rule of the market.
Films
Use synonyms
 must be attractive to
people
Use synonyms
.

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structure
Make a full plan before you write. A small intro, a body with two ideas, and a short end.
task
Say your view clearly in the intro and keep it in the end.
content
Add more detail to each idea with simple facts or real life notes.
coherence
Use more joining words to show how ideas go and to compare.
grammar
Check the grammar of easy sentences, like when to use is/are, and make verbs fit.
grammar
Watch plural and verb tense in everyday sentences.
content
The essay shows both sides and a view on funding.
style
It uses plain words that readers can follow.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Globalization
  • Cultural exchange
  • Cinematic expertise
  • Diverse narratives
  • Enriching cultural experience
  • Linguistic proficiency
  • Cinematography advancements
  • Government subsidies
  • Promote local talent
  • Economic sustainability
What to do next:
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