IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Popular events like the football world cup and other international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#events #football #world #cup #occasions #tensions #emotions
The international sporting occasion, especially the football Worldcup were held in various
countries
 with a huge amount of soccer
teams
 and fans, which has made it became one of the most well-known
events
. These sporting occasions play an integral characteristic in easing international tensions in difficult times and show nationalism in a proper way.
Initially
, these global occasions are not only competitive but
also
 a chance for participates to earn their spurs and glories for their
countries
 with all their enthusiasm.
Furthermore
, these
events
 are
also
 a special occasion for these
countries
 to show their cultures and a perfect time for those who are mesmerized by sports to cheer for their
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
teams
 or participants.
As a result
, when their participants win a match, they wear their
teams
’ shirts, buy national flags or stick their national symbol stickers on their faces, or even held a parade as a congratulation for the success of their
teams
.
Besides
 that, the rare situation of a footballer whose name is
Eriksen
 is an ordinary example that proves how these global sporting
events
 bring nations together. After
Eriksen
 had a stroke, the Denmark team decided not to postpone the match;
however
, when the Finland team had a goal, there was no cheer for Finland because of respect to
Eriksen
.
Moreover
, there were numerous wishes and respect from other football
teams
 to
Eriksen
, which show human love and sympathy among
countries
 to each other. In conclusion, I hold the view that sporting
events
 play an irreplaceable role in gathering international relationships and liberating patriotic feelings.
Submitted by thanhannguyen2209 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: