some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large number of toys?

#parents #children #toys #child

Presently, it is true that many families prefer to buy a vast number of

toys

for their kids. Even though there are numerous benefits for

this

, there are

also

negative issues

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

need to be considered which will be

further

discussed in the following essay. On the one hand, there are various advantages to

children

. The

first

and most significant is the advancement in creativity. The reason for

this

is nowadays most

toys

are flexible to

children

to create their own styles to play, resulting in inspiring

children

for not fix in their minds.

Moreover

, they can

also

mix different

toys

to make a new one like a fantasy town or an incredible vehicle depending on their minds. Apart

Correct your spelling

from

show examples

form

Correct your spelling

from

show examples

this

, another point is increasing the

knowledges

Change the wording

knowledge

pieces of knowledge

bits of knowledge

show examples

due to many companies

such

as National Geographic try to add several

knowledges

Change the wording

pieces of knowledge

bits of knowledge

show examples

about chemistry and physics to their

toys

This

leads to

children

can learn many subjects during playing

their

Change preposition

with their

show examples

toys

. Despite the positive effects, some negative impacts need to be considered. The most essential is a lack of interaction between people due to most

children

only pay attention to their

toys

, resulting in

they

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

spent a lot of time with themselves.

Therefore

, they prefer to stay at home

instead

of doing outdoor activities with other

children

. A

further

point is harmful

for

Change the preposition

show examples

their health.

This

is mainly due to toxic chemical substances in

toys

may

Correct pronoun usage

that may

show examples

cause some

side-effects

Correct your spelling

side effects

show examples

if they do not play properly and

careless

Add a missing verb

are careless

show examples

. In conclusion, while there are a variety of benefits, there are some drawbacks as well. If families explain

their

Change preposition

to their

show examples

children

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

importance of

toys

and how they play properly,

then

they will receive more benefits.

Therefore

, it is my belief that the overall advantages to

children

seem to outweigh the disadvantages.

Submitted by ploy_41 on Thu Aug 19 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

297 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large number of toys?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries today, crime novels and TV crime dramas are becoming more and more popular. Why do you think these book and TV shows are popular? What is your opinion of crime fiction and TV drama?

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, it is getting difficult for people to enjoy their lives in cities. Why do you think this is? What can the government do to make life in cities more enjoyable?

Some people think that children should aim to their best at what they are doing while others believe it is not necessary for them. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Research has shown that the transportation of products and people are the main source of pollution. Some people believe government should be in charge of this, while others believe it is the fault of individuals. Discuss both views and give your opinion.