IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

People nowadays tend to have children at older ages. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #children #ages #outweigh
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The past fifty years have seen a dramatic increase in the percentage of families who prefer to delay having
children
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. I argue
this
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 trend and
it’s
Correct your spelling
its
show examples
 long term ramifications are negative in nature .
This
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 will be proven in the following lines. Looking
first
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 at
it’s
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its
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positive
Add an article
a positive
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 impact, some people believe that spend a long time without
children
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 will enhance the relationship between the couples.They think
thatevery
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that every
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can realize and adjust
Change preposition
to himself
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himself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
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 with the other person and
this
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 will help them to prepare a positive family atmosphere to bring up the
children
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. Turning to the positive sides ,
children
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 play a crucial role
of
Change preposition
in
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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family stabilization. Each
couples
Change to a singular noun
couple
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 has
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
 own conflicts and the relationship can break down at any time if they
Correct your spelling
do
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don
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do
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 not have
children
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.The memories of the family gathering and the future of those
children
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 make the parents thinking many times before taking the decision of
divorec
Correct your spelling
divorce
.
Thus
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, the long term results of having
children
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 at
older
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an older
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 age can be seen as helpless.
Further
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 and more importantly, It appears that bringing up
children
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 need
a high physical efforts
Correct the article-noun agreement
high physical efforts
a high physical effort
show examples
.
children
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 like to run, swim and play with their parents .If you have
children
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 when you are elderly, you will not be able to play with them.
For instance
Linking Words
 one of my best
friend
Change to a plural noun
friends
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 always say to me that his father brought him when he was 60 years so,their relationship is weak.
Bottomline
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Bottom line
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,All
this
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 considered ,
ther
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there
they
 are both positive
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and
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an
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and
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 negatives .I once
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again
show examples
a gain
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again
show examples
 reaffirm my position the negative aspects
excees
Correct your spelling
exceed
 the positive
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
show examples
.
Submitted by m.nafsy on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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