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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe famous people’s support towards international aid organizations draws attention to problems. Others think celebrities make the problems less important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #people’s #support #aid #organizations #attention #celebrities
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The chunk of the
population
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 deems that celebrities can provide big assistance to international welfare
organizations
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 while others hold totally an opposite opinion. In the upcoming paragraphs, I will give a plausible explanation on both views and discuss my point of view over
this
Linking Words
 controversial debate. On the one hand, many famous persons have a big fan following especially youth are more inclined towards their favourite celebrities. They try to imitate them by every means. It's always been a good idea to involve those persons in aiding
organizations
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. They can promote their
message
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 in less time to a larger
population
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.
For instance
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, the Two richest persons Mark Zuckerberg and Bill gates have started an awareness program about Al's disease. They encouraged the
population
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 to perform voluntary work in
this
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 program. 70% of the younger
population
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 offered their voluntary role after their appeal. Another Example, A famous footballer who spread the word through his Twitter account that coke is not good for health. on the very
next
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 day, the product sales of coke has decreased by 55%.
On the other hand
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, numerous
people
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 opine that helping
organizations
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 should spread their
message
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by
Change preposition
to
show examples
 local
people
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. Fan followers start paying attention to what celebrity is wearing rather than paying attention to the
message
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 they are trying to convey. In 2013 there was a massive earthquake occurred in Africa. some Hollywood actors went there to give donations and convince other
people
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 to help
organizations
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 speed up their work.
On the contrary
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,
people
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 went there to meet their favourite celebs. They ignore the actual
message
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 and brought chaos. In a nutshell, I am more in favour of not involving celebrities in awareness or welfare programs. It will only cost money which can utilize for the betterment of needy
people
Use synonyms
.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • international aid organizations
  • draws attention
  • less important
  • famous people
  • celebrities
  • volunteer support
  • overshadow
  • dilute
  • sustainability
  • endorsement
  • genuine
  • advocacy
  • deeper understanding
  • engaged
  • informed base
  • committed
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