IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Many young people change their jobs and careers. What are the reasons for this, Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #change #jobs #careers
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In recent days, the younger generations are changing
work
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 and the type of
jobs
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 they do. There are a number of causes that lead to
this
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 behaviour like
work
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 pressure, unconducive
work
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 environment among others. I believe that doing
this
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 will have detrimental effects on someone’s career. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss why the drawbacks outweigh the benefits of
work
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 and career
change
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.
To begin
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 with, young employees in any
work
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 environment are always on the lookout for well-paying
jobs
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. In most countries, there are companies or professions that offer good salaries to their employees, and
this
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 is the key driving factor that makes young workers
change
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 their
work
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 and careers. Safaricom,
for example
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, is a tech firm in Kenya that offers high packages to its workers, and
also
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 offers a lot of benefits,
such
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 as health insurance, house, and transport allowances. Another factor making young stars shift
jobs
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 is an unconducive
work
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 environment. There are some workstations that put pressure on their employees to deliver on tasks. Asking workers,
for instance
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, to report to
work
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 on Saturdays in order to achieve a given milestone could make them stressed and reduce their level of productivity. Some managers could
also
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 be not so good team leaders, and
as a result
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, all these contribute towards the creation of a toxic workplace that could drive people out in numbers. In my opinion, changing
jobs
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 or professions may taint your resume and may not be a good impression to employers. If a professional is used to these behaviours, employers may be sceptical to put you in a managerial position as you may cut a figure as someone not loyal to a particular organisation. In conclusion, it is important to
change
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work
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 as and when necessary. Moving from one company to another will negatively affect progress in your career, and hirers may shun you if you
change
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work
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 all the time.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • career switch
  • job dissatisfaction
  • financial incentives
  • personal fulfillment
  • professional advancement
  • exploratory journey
  • toxic workplace
  • acquisition of new competencies
  • workplace flexibility
  • adapting to evolving industries
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