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Band 2

2. Some people say that spending time to develop a successful career is the most important thing. Others say that spending time with friends & family is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #time #career #friends
In today's
world building
Add a hyphen
world-building
show examples
 successful
carrier
 is
most
Add an article
a most
show examples
 priority to
young
Add an article
the young
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 generation.
However
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,However
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 there were
set
Correct article usage
a set
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 of group people who
believes
Change the verb form
believe
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 spending
time
 with immediate family members and friends is most valuable. In my
view
Add a comma
,view
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 these both
are suppose
Change the verb form
are supposed
show examples
 to balance to lead
sucessful
Correct your spelling
successful
 life. In
below
Correct article usage
the below
show examples
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 I am going to discuss
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
these points. 
Firstly
, as
young
Correct article usage
a young
show examples
star
Add a comma
,star
show examples
 it's very important to build
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
 professional
carrier
 to full fill your financial needs and social status in society. It is impossible to achieve your
desigers
Correct your spelling
designers
 without
established
Add an article
an established
the established
show examples
carrier
. In the buying process of
successful
Correct article usage
a successful
show examples
carrier
Add a comma
,carrier
show examples
 you are may
loose
Replace the word
lose
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lot
Change the article
a lot
show examples
 of joyful
time
 but at the end of it will give
self satisfaction
Add a hyphen
self-satisfaction
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.
Moreover
 in the process of professional
carrier
 building young generation will spend most of
time
Correct pronoun usage
their time
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to focus
Change the verb form
focusing
show examples
 on competition with others and not allow any space to spend some
time
 with close buddies and family
memebers
Correct your spelling
members
. It will make
barricade
Correct article usage
a barricade
show examples
 on your relationship and whenever you required
support
Add the particle
to support
show examples
 you may
lost
Change the verb form
lose
be lost
show examples
 the helping hand with
this
 behaviour. In conclusion on
above
Correct article usage
the above
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 statements if you
Add the particle
towant
show examples
want
Correct your spelling
won't
show examples
 be successful in
you
Change the pronoun
your
show examples
 life you
are suppose
Change the verb form
are supposed
show examples
 to build a successful
carrier
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 balancing emotions.
Submitted by devireddyammaiah on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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