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Writing Samples
Band 4

Some feel that school uniforms make schools safer for students, create a "level playing field" that reduces socioeconomic disparities and encourage children to focus on their studies rather than their clothes. Others say school uniforms infringe upon students' right to express their individuality, have no positive effect on behavior and academic achievement.Discuss both sides & give your opinion.

#feel #school #uniforms #schools #students #level #field #disparities #children #focus #studies #clothes #right #individuality #effect #behavior #achievement
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Looking towards highly socioeconomic disparity, there have been efforts made by professionals by implementing
uniforms
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 for children at
school
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. While some says
school
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uniforms
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 infringe upon
students
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’ right to express their individuality, have no positive effect on behaviour and academic achievement. In my opinion, some set of rules to avoid discrimination on
demographic
Correct article usage
a demographic
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 basis are rather worth than need to express individuality.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
school
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 uniform makes
school
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 a safer place for
students
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, create a "level playing field" that reduces socioeconomic disparities and encourage children to focus on their studies rather than their clothes.
Uniforms
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 can be treated as
unique
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a unique
the unique
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 identity to promote positivity which
allow
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allows
show examples
students
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 to have the same
school
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 spirit. In our society,
uniforms
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 have always been used to promote ideas and belongings. There is
reason
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the reason
a reason
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 why
Indian
Correct article usage
the Indian
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 Army has
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
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 own
uniforms
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, IT sectors use
common
Correct article usage
a common
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 formal dress code, every quiz competition
defined
Add a missing verb
is defined
show examples
 by their own set of
wearing
Replace the word
wears
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. In
this
Linking Words
way
Add a comma
,way
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students
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 can
also
Linking Words
 be focused on their studies rather than appearances.
School
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 attire provides
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
transparency in the campus and gives equal treatment to every individual despite
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
their economic background. On other hand, some people think that
Use synonyms
students’
Correct your spelling
students
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 have
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
 to express their individuality. They can experiment with their clothing and accessories. Having
specific
Correct article usage
a specific
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 dress code limits their creativity to convey themselves. Going
further
Linking Words
, there have been scenarios evidenced that children from some schools have
beenviolently
Correct your spelling
been violently
 targeted easily with the help of
uniforms
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. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 both of the sides have winning content, I would like to go with the uniform as it is
cost effective
Add a hyphen
cost-effective
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, helps prevent
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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 to feel less confident based on how they dress and of course it’s convenient to
students
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 as well
as
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apply
show examples
parents.
Submitted by nitsam3 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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