IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The first car appeared on the British roads in 1888. By the year 2000, there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give your own opinion on the issue. Use your own experience or an example to support your idea.

#first #car #british #roads #year #million #vehicles #alternative #forms #transport #laws #control #ownership #support #idea
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The
number
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 of
cars
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 has been doubled year by year, causing several problems. Certain individuals think that encouragement of alternative ways of transport as well as international laws are required to restrict
excessive
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the excessive
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 volume of
cars
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. I am in complete agreement with
this
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 statement as it can alleviate traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
 in the
country
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 and,
also
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, current environmental problems. Fostering choices of transport rather than
cars
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 reduce traffic congestion. If
government
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the government
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 provided a great quality of public transport for
his
Correct pronoun usage
its
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 citizens, they would choose
this
Linking Words
 over their
cars
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 because it offers convenient and price-effective.
In addition
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, international laws that limit the
number
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 of car possession even lower
considerable
Correct article usage
the considerable
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 amount of
cars
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 on the road. In Thailand, almost every people own at least one personal
car
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care
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 because
government
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the government
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 did not take any action and provide
proper
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a proper
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 alternative way for citizen and
this
Linking Words
 makes traffic in the
country
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 jam.
Furthermore
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, the natural environment would be better by doing so. Acidic gases, that destroy the atmosphere and cause global warming,
such
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 as carbon dioxide as well as noise pollution
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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emitted by
cars
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 will be lowered;
hence
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, the current global warming situation which many people concern
is
Change preposition
about is
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 alleviated.
Also
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, in Thailand, there are both air and noise pollution,
causing
Change the form of the verb
caused
show examples
 by
cars
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, and
this
Linking Words
worsen
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worsens
show examples
 the environment in the
country
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. In conclusion,
government
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the government
show examples
 should encourage people to pick other options of commuting and control
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number
Correct article usage
the number
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 of car ownership to reduce
cars
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 on the roads and to toxic gases. At the end of the day, reducing
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number
Correct article usage
the number
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 of
cars
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 certainly makes a
country
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 more pleasant.
Submitted by mintjinjutha on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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