Some people think that strict punishment for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however ,believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety. Discuss both view and give your own opinion.

#people #punishment #offences #traffic #accidents #measures #road #safety

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Some

people

Use synonyms

argue that giving severe punishments for driving offences are crucial to

reduce

Change the verb form

reducing

show examples

traffic

Use synonyms

accidents

Use synonyms

while others believe that other

measures

Use synonyms

should be taken in order to improve

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

road safety. In my opinion, I wholeheartedly claim that serious penalties are more reasonable solutions to reduce

this

Linking Words

trend than having better

measures

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. On the one hand, it is true that having strong punishments like

fine

Fix the agreement mistake

fines

show examples

canceling

Change the spelling

cancelling

show examples

licenses and locking up drivers who break serious

rules

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in the cells can decrease the

numbers

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number

show examples

accidents

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. For

this

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reason,

People

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might not voluntarily follow the

regulations

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and would break them if possible.

For instance

Linking Words

, in

Singapore

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,Singapore

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the

rules

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for driving cars are highly severe by

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

Moreover

Linking Words

, they make their citizens pay a lot of fines or putting them into

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

jail at once if they have

accidents

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, which they thought those kinds of

accidents

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rigorous.

As a result

Linking Words

, their country security systems for

traffic

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accidents

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are at a low level.

Besides

Linking Words

, the drivers will become more disciplined and alert.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, other

measures

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are essential in maintaining

traffic

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rules

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and

regulations

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Furthermore

Linking Words

, they can give drivers significant educations about

traffic

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accidents

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, as well as

rules

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and

regulations

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when driving. Those can ameliorate the drivers’ knowledge.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, it will be boring if it is only taught without any demonstration. To exemplify, Myanmar, which is included in one of

Add a hyphen

south-east

show examples

south

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the south

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east Asian countries, lacks

Remove the preposition

apply

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severe

rules

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and

regulations

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Hence

Linking Words

, most

people

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in that country disobey them when it comes to

real

Add an article

the real

a real

show examples

situation

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situations

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;

consequently

Linking Words

, some

people

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have less knowledge about driving

measures

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for some

reasons

Fix the agreement mistake

reason

show examples

Thus

Linking Words

, the rate of

accidents

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has increased. By and large, it is undeniable that improving from both sides can lead to great results. I personally believe that giving punishments is more

benefit

Replace the word

beneficial

show examples

than other means.

Submitted by Shwe Yamin on Fri Aug 27 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

300 words

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Engaging in labor is an essential undertaking for subsistence. Numerous people are overworked and consequently have less time to unwind. The advantages and disadvantages will be discussed in the subsequent paragraph.

Some people think that strict punishment for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however ,believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety. Discuss both view and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Developing countries require help offered by international organization to ensure healthy and sustainable development. Some people think that financial aids is important. Other believe that practical aid and advice is more important. Discuss both these views and give youw own opinion.

Many people work long hour, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?