Some people think that the detailed criminal description on newspaper and TV has bad influences, so this kind of information should be restricted on the media. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Day by day, we can easily
approaching
Change the verb form
approach
be approaching
show examples
a great of
information
related
crime
Change preposition
to crime
show examples
and violence. Some individuals have
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
negative feelings by
detailed
Add an article
the detailed
a detailed
show examples
inhumane
description
Fix the agreement mistake
descriptions
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
show examples
and
media
and they
thin
Correct your spelling
think
show examples
this
kind of
information
should be limited. In my opinion, I totally have the same thinking and support restricting detailed
description
Fix the agreement mistake
descriptions
show examples
about murderers on social
media
. There are two important reasons why violence and bloody
news
should be limited.
Firstly
, there will be bad influences on readers and watchers, especially teenagers. Approaching
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
inhumane
news
will scare children and
image
Correct article usage
the image
show examples
of murderers will become
unshakable
Add an article
an unshakable
show examples
obsession with them. To the Time
News
in Japan, there are annual average
10
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of 10
show examples
% of children being
depression
Replace the word
depressed
show examples
due to violent obsession on TV.
Secondly
, in the long run, youngsters will have no belief
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
life and society and be afraid of creating
new
Add an article
a new
the new
show examples
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
and communicating with
people
around them.
In addition
, following too much
information
related criminal description lead to insensitivity phenomena in society in these days. When images of killing
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
appear frequently,
people
gradually consider it as normal
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
and have negative thinking about life. They accept savage activities and are easily entangled in crime.
Therefore
,
instead
of providing detailed inhumane
information
with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
high frequency on
media
,
people
should limit
this
kind of
details
Fix the agreement mistake
detail
show examples
and just show criminal
news
with extenuating
circumstance
Fix the agreement mistake
circumstances
show examples
for the purpose of enhancing awareness. In concluding, savage
information
on TV and newspaper not only bring no benefits for
people
but
also
create obsession and negative thinking for them.
Thus
, it is necessary to restrict violence and bloody
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
media
.
Submitted by phuongthanh.working on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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